Cascades of Time (Chp 10)

Chapter 10: Battle breaks the silence

(Location: Valcarry 1)

Valcarry 1 continued to move deeper into the clouds. When it was completely out of range of the city, it remained stationary in the air, above the clouds, where there was no hiding. The ten airships, that followed were much smaller, but they spaced themselves out evenly. Valcarry 1 was surrounded.

 

A loud voice boomed out from the Valcarry. “This is David Jones. My ship Valcarry 1 is known for being the largest airship in the world. I admit it is not the strongest but it definitely counts among the top ten. Don’t forget Kerr Spencer invented this ship. Do not underestimate it. I don’t know what you want but I suggest you turn around and leave.”

 

The airships began to change into assault mode. Cannons and guns began to extend from them through panels that opened on the sides.

 

“I see they do not want to back down,” exclaimed David Jones, “change into formation lioness, captain!” The captain obliged all too quickly. Valcarry 1 was a beautiful giantess beneath the sun, but that was no more. Hundreds of panels shifted and cannons protruded from them. Rows upon rows of machine guns, fixed onto their targets. Out of both sides, two large panels shifted to reveal two huge guns.

 

The airships waited no longer. They began to fire rapidly, showering the Valcarry with their weapons. Lucas saw the bullets reach near the Valcarry, but then they exploded before they touched. Every time a bullet hit, he saw a force field come into sight before momentarily disappearing. When the force field appeared, he noticed it was formed of interlocking purple octagons. The whole Valcarry was surrounded by them.

 

“Sir, their bullets are not strong but occasionally they give a good hit. Our primary force field remains untouched, whilst our secondary force field is at ninety-nine per cent.” informed a man, stationed near a set of computers. The captain nodded approvingly. Lucas was amazed. Ten fully armed airships could not even scratch this vessel.

 

The two huge guns at the sides both blasted at the same time. Their targets were not the airships but the air around. After two seconds the blast exploded, sending out shockwaves across the air. It began to knock the small airships across the sky, but the Valcarry remained stationary. Before the airships could gain stability, the rows of cannons began firing.

 

Lucas witnessed thousands of bullets souring through the skies. He saw the airships getting battered. For the first few minutes, he saw a small glimpse of force field on the enemy ships, but he soon learned they were not near impressive as the Valcarry’s defences. Many of the airships began to explode. The others were dodging, but the captain simply smirked. He pressed a button on the ship and Lucas saw an electrical wave appear outside the Valcarry.

 

The wave surged outwards seemingly harmless. Then Lucas saw its wrath. The thousands of bullets that had missed their target came hurtling back. The electrical wave had somehow attracted them back. The shaken airships were not ready for the assault and they all collided, turning into huge blazing balls of fire in the sky. Lucas watched as the last of the ships burned to the ground.

 

“There is only a mountain below. They will damage no one sir.” the captain reassured David Jones.

 

Suddenly the whole room turned a flashing red, as all the lights began to flash simultaneously. A huge alarm sounded. “Intruders alert, intruders alert. Twenty intruders have been identified near medical unit two.”  Lucas became pale as he realised that was where the woman was being kept. Without thinking he rushed out of the main room and into the corridors. He heard shouts of protest behind him but he did not pay any attention.

 

Lucas bounded across the corridors turning left, right, and any direction it took to get him to his destination. He arrived at the medical unit and burst into the room, where she was being kept. He was already too late. There was already a man there. He was wearing the same black armour as the men from before.

 

Rage built up inside him, as he remembered the burning house and the screams of the dying. Lucas charged forward. He caught the man unawares and knocked him down. Before he could get up, Lucas punched him repeatedly until he stopped moving. Lucas picked up the gun he was holding.

 

He heard footsteps behind him and he turned. Lucas felt a pang of pain as the back of a gun knocked into his face. He stumbled to the floor and spat out blood. Before he could get up he got kicked down. Lucas pretended to be unconscious. The man kicked him once more and moved forward to the bed, where the woman lay. Lucas jumped up and kicked the man down. He took the flower vase next to the bed and smashed it on the man’s head.

 

It was no good. The attacker was fully armoured. He fell back and began firing his gun. Lucas felt a bullet pierce his left thigh. He collapsed to the floor. The man got up and took out a knife. He was about to drive the knife in, when the woman rose once again. But this time she did not look as if she was in a trance. She grabbed his knife and twisted it out of his hands.

 

Lucas saw her extended two of her fingers. She jabbed them sharply into the man’s neck twice. The man fell to the floor clutching his throat. He was alive and conscious but he seemed unable to move. It was as if he was struggling to breathe. But how? thought Lucas.

 

“Are you alright, miss?” he asked through clenched teeth. Lucas winced from the pain in his thigh.

 

“Miss? I am only twenty two. You look around the same age. My name is Mia Hasagua. And it looks like you are the one in need of help. This is David Jones’ Valcarry 1. The safest place to be in here, is the main room or one of the safety bunkers. I will help you.” She informed in a kind tone and almost normal tone as if she was another average woman.

 

But no she wasn’t. When asleep, she had been radiant. Awake she was breath taking. Her huge eyes shone like the morning sun, while her long hair fell down her sides with elegance like none Lucas had seen. She seemed strong and kind. Lucas heard footsteps. David Jones arrived promptly, flanked by a hoard of men in suits, armed with huge guns.

 

“There you are. How could go off running like that? Oh, I see your girlfriend is awake. Quickly, you two come with me. We must get you to safety.” he stated reassuringly.

 

“That will not be necessary. I will take care of the intruders.” replied Mia. A flash appeared where she had been and she disappeared. Within a second she appeared behind the flank of men. She flashed again and she was at the end of the corridor. Another flash followed before she disappeared from sight. Lucas looked gobsmacked but David Jones only shook his head.

 

“She presumes too much. Just because she is a Xavian (ex-a-vee-n) does not mean she is invincible. After all they must have some on their side. It is the only explanation as to how they got on board so brilliantly.”

 

Lucas looked from David Jones to his men’s’ faces. There was a look of understanding there that confused him. How did they not find someone like Mia shocking? It only meant they were used to such experiences. A few minutes later a voice spoke from one of the men’s watches. “This is the captain. All the intruders have been dealt with. We have captured them all. The woman from the coma is in the main room waiting for you sir.”

 

Later that day everything had calmed down. There had been no casualties and Lucas had had his leg bandaged. Everyone was enjoying lunch as David Jones conversed with Mia.

 

“I have absolutely no idea why they attacked, any ideas?” he enquired innocently.

 

“They were coming for me!” Mia informed.

 

“So that is why they attacked the House of Elrah.” Lucas stated. Mia looked confused. He realised she had no recollection of the previous events. He informed her of everything that had happened.

 

“In that case they were undoubtedly coming for the book.” She informed once again completely sure of herself. David Jones sat straight. His facial expression changed into one of seriousness.

 

“The book can only mean the book. I didn’t know it was in this part of the timeline. That means it’s already begun. I must leave immediately then. I have people I must meet. That means we must post phone our fated union until another date. You two are in each other’s capable hands. I will give you a card that you can use to rent out a hotel room, etc.”

 

David Jones stood up. Lucas looked confused. Mia placed a comforting hand on his lap.

 

“I will bring you up to speed I promise. You have lost your home to this wretched cause. Rest assured you will learn everything. But for now it is best you stay with me Lucas.”

 

Lucas nodded. It was all he could do at that moment. He felt inferior for being injured and for not knowing anything.

 

“One of the smaller airships in the garage will take you back to Phoenix City. I am afraid I will go straight on from here. Goodbye Lucas and goodbye, my beautiful lady Mia until we meet again.”

 

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Hey Myst,

Sorry it took me this long to get this done. I'll try to brief. Here goes,

So, the start is good and the reader feels that something good is going to happen yet when it comes to this part--

this is David Jones. My ship Valcarry 1 is known for being the largest airship in the world. I admit it is not the strongest but it definitely counts among the top ten. Don’t forget Kerr Spencer invented this ship. Do not underestimate it. I don’t know what you want but I suggest you turn around and leave.”


That is not how one captain responses to another. David sounds immature. The fact that David just acts like that cannot be justifying here. His words make the reader feel like this isn't the real work but a mean parody of our work. Put some professionalism in it, some military jargon or phrases to make it realistic. otherwise no one's gonna believe the story.

Mia's personality

Remember I had problems with Lucas' behaviors? And with Lord Patience's? and David's? and with guardiwar's?
Well, guess what? now I have one with Mia too.

If you look at the story practically,
This gal just wakes up after a long sleep and seems to know pretty much everything that is going around. This feels disturbing. You cannot explain this by saying that's how she acts or that she has some special powers with provide her information like this.

You already have too many characters with special features. you have to make at least somebody realistic. or else the reader will be unable to relate to somebody. there's a saying-- You cannot distinguish darkness without light. you have to put some light ( which in your case is realism ) in this project.

How to pronounce?

Just because she is a Xavian (ex-a-vee-n) does not mean she is invincible.


Please, do not tell the readers how to pronounce certain words in the middle of the story. As a reader, I don't like it because it makes me look uneducated. Like I was supposed to know how it sounds.

When words go missing

there are few places where words are missing. You have at least read it twice before posting it. Because when words go missing the stature of the work decreases.
For example here,

“There you are. How could #FF0000 ">yougo off running like that? Oh, I see your girlfriend is awake


There's also some places where there's some mechanical errors that needs to be set straight.

Ending?

this is the part where I am afraid the readers will start swearing at you. You simply create the departure of a lot of characters here with the scene where Lucas and Mia goes away on their own; leaving the reader flabbergasted to why then there was the necessity to bring in so much characters if you were going to throw them away midway.

If you have any questions?inquiries/hate-mail....you know how to PM me.

Thanks and Keep writing,

Puck

Sorry, for the typos. It should be....."mean parody of *your work."



A true poet does not bother to be poetical. Nor does a nursery gardener scent his roses.
— Jean Cocteau