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Young Writers Society


16+

Pokemon Ultimate Evolution Season Two: Episode 22, Like It Is

by dark


Warning: This work has been rated 16+.

"Karen! Karen wake up!" Jake shouted. "Karen!"

"Ugh, stop with the yelling at me..." Karen groaned. "My head is throbbing."

"We should get out of here." Jake held her in his hands. "Why did you transform back?"

"Because when you take too much damage, you can't stay in species form, idiot!" Karen yelled, shoving Jake off of her shoulders. "Oh, my head..."

"I told you not to taunt her, Karen. One of the reason's she left me was because I wanted to help her with her anger problems. She was up for it..." Jake sighed. "Now we're soaking wet and hurting all over..."

"Now? You tell me this now?" Karen slapped him. "You know my battle style involves mind games! Why would you let me get into something that almost killed us both?" Karen sank down to the ground and sobbed. People walking by tried to help her, but Jake shooed them away with a glare.

"Karen, whenever I tell you something, you don't listen, that's why I didn't say anything." Jake held her close, fixing her matted hair. "We're still alive, and we're still going to kill them all. It looks like Pan's never coming back to me..."

"What made you think she would? I just killed her brother. She won't just forgive either of us." Karen breathed. "Forget it, we end this here and now. We're going to get in there and end this!

"It's not that easy, Karen..."

"Stop being afraid!" Karen slapped Jake harder. "We're ending their lives, and theirs nothing you can say that'll change my mind! No one knocks me out and gets away with it!"

"Okay, but I'm in charge from now on. I know Pan better then you do." Jake rubbed his cheek. "We wait for nightfall, got it?"

"Grr, fine." Karen pouted, crossing her arms under her chest. "Hey, I'm uh... Sorry for slapping you..."

"Don't be. You're so cute when you're angry, so I just have to let it slide!" Jake smirked.

"Shut up, Jake!" Karen snapped. "I swear I don't know why anyone would let you evolve! Gah, I'm gonna go get some new clothes. If you're coming, follow me. If not, meet me by the boutique."

"How do you plan on buying clothes?" Jake asked.

"No one said anything about buying, dumbass..."

----

"Ryan, you probably can't here me now, but..." Pan whispered. "I did it; I kept them safe. For the moment at least." Pan took my hands. "The warmth is returning, that's good right? Yeah that's good... You think that's good right?"

"Pan? Pan, what are you doing?" Jason asked. He sidled up next to her and longed into her eyes. "You look insane, everything alright?"

"I'm fine Jason." Pan said, snarled. "Can you leave me and Ryan alone, just for a second?"

"Okay, but I just wanted to know how it went out there." Jason tugged at her sleeve.

"Jason I said go away!" She snatched her arm away from him.

"Ah, I've had enough of this Pan! He's my brother and Cristina's too! He doesn't belong to you!" Jason yelled. "Instead of taking your anger out on us, why don't you work with us? Did you even consider how Ryan would feel if he saw how you treaded Cristina earlier? If you weren't his sister, he probably would have killed you! I don't know what's going on, but you need to get it together, or you're going to put us in a way deeper hole! Just because Ryan's not able to protect us right now, doesn't mean we are't still a family. Pan you're making us fall apart!"

Pan backed away from Jason an sat against a wall, holding her head in her hands. "You're right, Jason..." She whispered. "This is all my fault; Ryan's near death because of me, because I couldn't protect him..."

Jason laughed. "What is wrong with you, Pan, seriously?"

'"What?" Pan said, lifting her head.

"Ryan doesn't need protecting. Things happen, and they always will happen."

"But you saw what happened to him!" Pan exclaimed. "How could you be so cool about this?"

"Yeah, we all did. I may look fine on the outside, but you don't know how I really feel. I just lost the love of my life, in case you forgot. It would take me years to get over the death of Ryan, too. So stop being so self centered. Honestly, I feel that you don't care about Ryan at all; That you only care about getting praise for something you know you can't do."

"T-That's not true..." Pan cried. "I love him."

"I may only be ten, but I tell it like it is. That's what Ryan taught me." Jason turned the lights off in the room. "Now do him a favor and leave him alone. You've bothered him enough." Jason left her to sit alone. She cried even harder now.

"Jason, what did you say to her?" Cristina asked, joining him by the front door. "She's bawling in there."

"I told her the truth, Cristina. It's just what I do."

"But you could've gone easy on her..."

"Yeah, give her something she doesn't deserve." Jason strapped outside and looked at the hole in the road. "She didn't go easy on you, so I couldn't give her that."

"She was angry, Jason." Cristina said. "Palkias want to defend the things they love, can't you see that? How could you think that she doesn't care about us? It's in her nature. Sure she's made a few mistakes, but look, we're okay. She was only doing what Ryan would have done."

"I'm not mad that she's being protective of us. She just has a real funny way of showing it..."

----

"Wow, Ryan, they're falling apart without you. Jason seems pretty cool though." Giri snickered. "Pan may be a bitch but damn, she can fight. Well sort of."

"Heard you the first time, man." I said. "I need to get back there."

"Too bad these things only work on people you're related to, so we can't check up on those two birds." Giri sighed. "If only I was more inclined in this field, then maybe I could use them to find my missing family..."

"You have long lost family too, huh?" I asked, in an uninterested tone.

"Doesn't sound like you care very much even though you can relate." Giri said.

"Well, I'm sitting here, waiting for my body to heal; I'm bored." I answered. "Most of all, I'm worried about my family.

"They'll be okay, Ryan." Flannery said. "They way Jason always talked about you always made me smile. See? He's perfectly fine without you."

"I know that much, Flannery." I sighed. "I just can't wait to get my hands on Jake and Karen though."

"Don't worry, Ryan. This dimension always messes with peoples personalities." Giri grinned. "You'll be back to normal once you leave. Well I hope that's the case."

"My personality is fine, Giri." I scoffed. "With all of this knowledge you have of me, you don't know me at all."

"I thought I knew just about as much as everyone in Rustboro City. I used to live there, so I heard a few stories from people."

"You can ramble about it once this is over!" I yelled.

"Hey, we shouldn't be getting out of hand here. There's more important matters at hand." Flannery interrupted. "Giri, would you mind checking how long Ryan's been waiting?"

"Oh right. I'll tell ya, this girl right here is master bomb diffuser. She's prevented four fights in the time she's been here." Giri laughed. "Before I piss you off again," He checked the watch on his wrist. "You've got an hour in a half still."

"Actually it was five fights..." Flannery blushed.

"Heh, cute..." I smiled. "Flannery check your screen, is everything okay on Jason's end?"

"Yeah, yeah, nothing's wrong." She hastened to say. "Jake and Karen seem to be waiting for nightfall, not that it'll help them tonight."

"What's different about tonight?" I asked.

"I like to call it a Flash Bomb." Giri said.

"Oh, tonights one of those nights when all the Clefairy on the moon use Flash to illuminate the planet. Aw, I wish I could see the look on their faces once they realize they're getting no help."

"Why do Clefairy do that anyway?" Flannery asked. "I mean it's good that I'll help your family a bit, but still."

"It's their way of 'brightening the mood' whenever they feel like it." Giri scoffed. "I don't understand certain species sometimes."

"Coming from a Pokemon of the dimension of antimatter!" I exclaimed. "No body understands a Giratina!"

"Wha- Shut up, Ryan! You're one too, you know!" Giri stood up and walked out of the park. "Oh, forget it. Call me if something interesting happens."

"Both of you, we need to focus!" Flannery giggled. "So anything else we need to access?"

"Other than the fact that a Flash Bomb last about an hour, no. I guess we're back to waiting." I groaned and stared at my tablet. "I wonder when Pan will stop crying already. She should've have expected that from Jason."

"I guess she still doesn't know you guys all that well." Flannery said. "I feel bad for her."

"You feel bad for everyone, don't you?" I asked. "Don't take this the wrong way, but why do you feel the need to care about everyone, even those who've hurt you?"

"Sometimes I ask myself that, too." Flannery shook her head. "Considering some of the things I've gone through, I should be a lot more bitter."

"Heh, it's alright. A long time ago I knew someone like you; Someone I love very much. She was so incapable of hate that she couldn't bring herself to hate her parents for the trouble they caused the both of us..."

Flannery nodded. "Wow, sounds like you've been through a lot of things with a lot of different people."

"Oh, ma cheri, you have no idea..."


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Thu Aug 21, 2014 1:39 pm
Hannah wrote a review...



Hey, I read your comment at the bottom of the page and I'm glad I did, because that's exactly what I was noticing throughout this whole chapter. I was going to come to my review to say -- "You should stop having the characters discuss this story as if they are authors and know exactly all the things you know about themselves." But turns out you were doing this on purpose.

I mean, for now I think it's fine. It's something that helps you get the thoughts clear in your head, get it out of your system, and if it keeps you floating and writing, that's awesome. But whenever you come back to edit (or whenever you think about it as you keep moving forward), remember that we don't know everything about ourselves. People are rarely so knowledgeable as to see themselves in big picture terms. They can sometimes guess at someone's general pattern, but that's also pretty rare. Because of that, regardless of whether your characters are much different from humans and have much higher reasoning capacity, this chapter comes off sounding very odd. Like I said, it's the information that YOU as an author should have projected through the characters' mouths.

In the future, try revealing these facts more gradually and more through action than through characters pondering out their lives together (especially in such tense moments as omg a family member is kind of dead -- they'd just be scrambling to do whatever they could to take care of him instead of talk about the nature of their personalities). I know it's a little strange because pokemon have characteristics that you can learn about in pokedexes or whatever, but still. These character should feel individual and we, as readers, should learn about them at the speed of their actions. We never feel very confident in trusting the word of other characters, know what I mean?

Like if I tell you my boyfriend is just so smart and he talks so well and smoothly, he's probably the best smooth talker -- you wouldn't really believe that (unless you believe me??). You'd want to see him talk smooth before you really realized that. In the same way, when the characters say Pan is so protective of family, we don't really believe it. We just want to see more examples and learn about her more gradually. And that's okay.

I hope these thoughts make sense to you, Dark!
See you next time!




dark says...


Thanks for the review, Han!



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Sat Aug 09, 2014 3:10 am
Pinkieishere1345 wrote a review...



Hey, dark. This is Pinkieishere1345 here. I like to review this chapter(aka episode) so please hang on with me.

First off, I love Pokemon! I watched the show when I was seven years old. I had a Pikachu doll in my bedroom. Also, I didn't read the other episodes(On this one)so I will read the other ones when I finished with this review.

Anyway, this is good episode of Pokemon. I see that you put some swears on there which it made this episode good. It has so many dialogue that it didn't have much descriptions in here. Maybe you can put some descriptions in here for me to see what it is going on. Also, you have some errors on here.

"A long time ago I knew someone like you; Someone I love very much."

You need to lowercase the 's' in the word 'someone'.

"Karen wake up!"

You need to put a comma between 'Karen' and 'wake'.

Overall, this is very good story. I know I don't know the characters very well so I will read the beginning of the show that you created. Also, I don't know what it is about. Well, I will find out later. See ya next time.

Good Job!

Love,

Pinkieishere1345




dark says...


There's a season one two, so don't forget that! Also, the season one episodes aren't as great as great as season two, so don't bother with nip picks to save yourself some time. I didn't edit the older ones so I could see how much I've gotten better. Thanks for reading!



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Sun Aug 03, 2014 11:20 pm
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dark says...



Occasionally there will be an episode where the characters go over their current situation. Like the Grace Period, it's required by my system. This is one of those episodes. It's purpose is to break up the plot a bit, open some space for comedy, (If I think there's been a shortage) and reveal what may or may not be key events. (Here, it is the reason Jason believes Pan does what she does.





An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backwards. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that life's going to launch you into something great, so just focus and keep aiming.
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