Published June 25, 2025
*This story is under my folder titled “The Laurence family’s deepest woes”. Gacha Club character designs are under my forum titled “My character designs<33[2]”. Enjoy!*
There once was a boy named Tyler Laurence, who had only one friend, and her name was Eleanor Wilson. Tyler was a boy who didn’t like to talk to many people and always seemed to be looking at others as though he wanted to search deeply into their souls, to find out what their innermost thoughts were.
It made most people uncomfortable, so most people avoided him, but not Eleanor. Eleanor was one of those people who was so incredibly lonely that when she saw that Tyler was friendless, she decided to let him into her life.
Eleanor had exuded a certain cheerfulness that only came with people who were eager to talk with everyone and somehow, it had made Tyler okay with telling her one day while they were at her house, in her room, that he was a demon from Hell, searching for a human woman to marry so that when he did, he could use her happiness as energy to make him stronger, but not before she could give him a son that would rule all of Hell with him.
She was a little shocked, yes, but her eyes sparked with a morbid curiosity when she asked if he was considering marrying her.
“No offense, Eleanor, but your soul isn’t the kind that I’m looking for.” Tyler said, puzzled as to why Eleanor would ask such a question and look a little disappointed with his answer.
But the moment soon faded from his mind and the next day at school, Eleanor came up to him in the hallway with a girl who looked just like her, except she was dressed in shades of black and gray, as though she were shrouded in the gloom of the graveyard.
Eleanor then said with a grin:
“Tyler, meet my sister, Kelly. Kelly, meet Tyler. He’s the guy I made friends with a few days ago! He’s so smart and cool that you just HAD to meet him and…”
Tyler was not paying attention to her, though, for he was looking at Kelly, a girl who looked like she wished she was floating off to a distant place, a girl who looked like she wasn’t quite listening, a girl who was brimming with so much joy over her life that she didn’t need to show it.
In other words, she was the perfect girl and Tyler wanted to get to know her more.
So, he went on and started talking to her, getting closer to Kelly over the years, learning that she had many spooky and scary thoughts, but that it was all because she looked at the world through a tint of Halloween, because she believed the world would be a better place that way and later on, as they got older, he knew that she was the one to marry.
Which was why when they both grew up, Tyler proposed to Kelly and had to stop himself from smiling with his sharpened teeth when she said yes.
Tyler and Kelly’s wedding at the church was every white-rose, angel-wing wedding dream that any lovesick couple could want. One would think that a demon wouldn’t be able to step foot into a church, but that only applied to demons that were in their true form and Tyler was not, so the magic that would have kept him out only bounced back from his human-like skin.
He saw Eleanor at the wedding, crying harder than anybody else, as though she were feeling deep, deep grief, but again, Tyler didn’t understand, because she wasn’t the one getting married.
Thankfully, it only lingered in his mind for a few seconds and then, when he was driving away with Kelly in the passenger seat, he could feel his excitement crawling inside of him through full force and so he grabbed Kelly’s face with a hand that twisted and contorted into a claws and hissed with a sharp-toothed smile:
“Your happiness would be perfect to use as energy, but…you’ll have to give me a son. A son who can rule with me. You’ll understand later.”
Her eyes were wide with confusion and a bit of terror, but he squeezed her face a little harder with his claw, so hard that thin streaks of blood spilled out and then, he let go.
Yes, she’d understand later. He would make sure Kelly would understand that she couldn’t leave, that she was going to stay with him, whether she wanted to or not.
Tyler would make sure Kelly understood how much danger she’d be in if she did not listen.
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Woah that story had a super fast pace. Lots of concepts, from nearly friendless Tyler having only Eleanor and then sudden reveal that he's a demon and Eleanor having 0 thoughts about that besides "if not me, why not my sister?" I wonder what she thought at that point. If she didn't believe him. Or if the rejection stung. If she just didn't like her sister? I'm also curious about why she's crying with so much grief at the wedding. Is she simply realising to what she's condemded Kelly or is it just the normal tears of joy at weddings that non-human Tyler can't understand?

A very sinister story!
Also, checking the other review: Hah! I'm not the only one pointing out dialogue formatting =D Remember, comma instead of period if there's a speech verb like say or whisper
She doesn%u2019t care that he is a demon. She%u2019s just sad that he didn%u2019t pick her. But he doesn%u2019t understand that.
Glad you enjoyed this!
Hey there! I just read your piece and WOW—this story really pulled me in! I loved the contrast between Tyler and Eleanor in the beginning. And honestly, I thought they were going to end up together. I did not see the plot twist (kelly or the fact that he was a demon) coming! Honestly, kinda annoyed at Tyler that he didn't understand the real reason behind Eleanor's grief (My heart broke for her, the girl deserves better)
Anyway, now for some constructive thoughts. I think Eleanor’s emotions could be explored a bit more. Her sadness at the wedding is powerful but it would be even better if we saw a bit more of it (Even though you hinted at the reason behind it, seeing it would be much more powerful)
And because I try and nitpick thing to help I noticed that there should be comma instead of a full stop here:
and "except" would sound better instead of "only" in this sentece:
And lastly, a few of the sentences are very long (like Eleanor’s intro or Tyler’s proposal background). Consider breaking them up to make them easier to follow.
Other than that, I really enjoyed this story—it was eerie, emotional, and full of unexpected turns! I enjoyed reading and if you continue the story, I would love the read the next part!!
I%u2019m very glad you enjoyed! You can read more about them from my folder on my profile %u201CThe Laurence family%u2019s deepest woes%u201D.
Will do!!