Young Writers Society

Hey, there. I found this poem while looking through your portfolio. This is a nice work that shows your love for the earth and your passion for protecting life and nature. One thing that I like about it is the inclusion of statistics and facts, such as dates and numbers. The mention of specific peoples and places makes it feel like you are dealing with something more realistic than abstract. It also showcases your knowledge and the fact that you've studied this issue.

That being said, the very same factor seems to make it a little un-poetic. Don't get me wrong - the way you've laid out the facts in a poetic format is nice and presents a more appealing way of reading the information and becoming aware of the details - but the whole piece is a little long and, to me, lacks the flow of poetry. While not all poetry must revolve around emotion and touchy-feely stuff, this one seems just a little too dry, as you don't particularly express your feelings on the issue until the end.

On a brighter note, it is, as I said, very informative, and that's nice. You've used lots of examples to prove your point. It's something you don't see in a lot of poetry. So it's cool to include it, but I personally would advise you to save most of the statistics, etc. for essays rather than poetry.

Anyway, nice job here, overall. Hope my constructive criticism isn't too overwhelming. I can see that this subject is your passion, and the writer's passion is, after all, the heart and inspiration of poetry. Keep it up with your talents!

Hewo wonderful persona.
It is Jade, once again giving a review to a beautiful poem.
This was so realistic and so true. This is the most amazing and truthful poem I have ever read. It flowed together beautifully and I could imagine every single scene you layed out. I can't put into words how good this is. This is perfect and I wish I could write as good as you. I honestly don't think there is anything differently that you could do. I am in no place to give you writing advice,,
I think, as Elinor said, that this does represent our modern times and I also think that qoute applies here. I also believe the quote, "When the world says 'give up', Hope whispers, 'Try one more time'" applies here. Because as the world is being destroyed you still have the hope that things will change and that you can fix everything that has been destroyed. That we can have another chance even though nobody else believes it will never happen.

Hey imaginer2018!

My name is Elinor, and I'm here to give you a review. I really like the idea of this poem. It's definitely something that very much speaks to our current times, especially with the US presidential administration not really believing in climate change. Overall, I think you do a really good job in this of balancing what we often say versus how our actions reflection that. I also like how you end the poem on a happy note. Have you ever heard the quote, "as long as there is life, there is hope"? I definitely think it applies here.

Right now, this is a bit on the long side, and I think it can be pared down. Poetry, in my option, is all about rhythm and flow, and right now some of your lines work better than others. I sort of like that the first person narrator has a sort of omniscience. There's a lot you bring up here, and that's fine, but I would maybe focus on fewer examples and work on describing those scenes. What does the beauty you mention in the first line look like?

Other quick notes --

Forests cover 31 percent of the land, and yet

More than 150 acres are lost every minute

In 1944, the concentration camps were discovered and liberated.

The United Nations formed, promising to never let anything like that

Ever happen again.

Ahh, sorry for the repeats down below, I must have accidentally sent it again and again and again.

AAAA YOUR SPOKEN WORD POEM!!!

I’ll review this soon!!

@WanderlustStardust@Radrook@BookishBrook@LittleLee@Big Brother


Here’s a new poem I wrote!