Hi, I think this is really nice! You used some really powerful phrases in this poem, and it also flows very well!
My only criticism would be this: in the line where you write ‘And the lenses they wear to distort the world make it not better to them then it is but only more comfortable’, I feel that this is a little vague. For instance, in what aspects would the world be more comfortable to them, and why? And what lenses are they wearing? Are they wearing invisible lenses that nobody can see; or if their lenses can be seen, how do they look like?
Anyways, this is a wonderful poem overall; and I hope to see more of your work at YWS soon!
Points: 104
Reviews: 7
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