tomorrow's tomatoes

Hello, to my amazing friend! Ellie stopping by with a review for this lovely poem of yours. I am here for the in-depth poetry reviewing event! Let's jump right into the review.

a seed is introduced to the earth.
i imagine whispered greetings,
the slow transformation of a hole into a home.

I love this right from the very first sentence. I picture the seed being put into the Earth. Normally we go about our day. Just doing things without thinking about emotions. I love how you give emotions to the dirt in the seeds and the soil and roots and everything. As a seed goes into the Earth, it is greeted like a friend. This hole becomes a home. I love this! You know that plant poems make me cry... especially your plant poems… Let's see how far I can get into this one xD

i reach down
to ma toes
and s t r e t c h
into tomorrow.

To my toes? Tomatoes? Tomato toes!? Ahhhhh.

First of all, as others have mentioned, I love how you stretch out that word stretch. The same with the word tomatoes. I like the separation of the syllables, creating a whole other meaning. I love how physical this poem is and how we get a mental image, as well as a physical right in front of us on the page. I like to imagine this verse being said by the tomato seed. It has just been planted in the soil. It has finally found its home. Perhaps the seed never realized its full potential until it was buried deep in the dirt. There is a place that is probably known for being… well… dirty. But it's not until this little seed experience something like this that I saw how amazing it is. I like to imagine this "stretching" as the tomato finally planting its roots and starting to grow. Like you said, this place is really become home.

in a far-fetched future,
there'll be a motley medley of
tomatoes, taking their time,
growing in the garden.

Nice work, using an alliteration in this stanza, especially. In the first line, we see the F, then, in the second line, we see the letter M, then, on the third line it's the letter T, and then in the fourth line it's the letter G. I take this as a secret note... FMTG... free my tomato garden... (kidding XD) Either way, I really love your choice of words as well. I find that your lines are well balanced in terms of syllables and the flow is nice.

perhaps next spring, i can try again.
but it's a long time to may
and it is too easy
to forget.

Ah. But Mint killed the tomato plants again T-T the second line in the stanza sort of stood out to me 'but it's a long time to may' sounded sort of weird to me reading it over. I would have said until may or 'till may, but I could totally be wrong on that. I do like the repetition of to and too in the next time though and then to again following that!

I love this image of hope that you create. Although the garden died, it still has a chance to grow again next year. I feel like this really beautifully, creates the image of life and death, trying and failing and trying again and never giving up. I absolutely feel so much for these tomatoes xD the last two lines were so beautiful, as well as the entire poem. I think you chose your words incredibly well in this poem. The alliteration was fantastic. The flow was wonderful, and I was engaged the entire time, because I felt like I could relate emotionally to the entire thing. I love this so much and I can't wait to read more of your amazing poetry!

Your friend,
Ellie

Hello, Spearmint! Happy Review Month! Valkyria here to leave a review for your lovely work. I will be using the YWS S'more Method today! Let's get into it:

Top Graham Cracker - What I Know
I love how this poem takes an anthropomorphic approach to tomatoes growing in a garden. It takes us far deeper into the tomato patch itself than the poem being about the person(s) tending to it. I also like the juxtaposition between the hopeful future of tomatoes growing and the possible reality that nothing may grow.

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - Room for Improvements
I could not see anything I would suggest!

Chocolate Bar - Highlights of the Piece

i reach down
to ma toes
and s t r e t c h
into tomorrow.

I love how "stretch" is spaced out. It emphasizes the action, but it also gives the illusion that the word itself is stretching. I also wanted to mention the spacing of "tomatoes" above. At first, I was confused as to why you formatted it that. Then I read it again, and I understood. I just had to look at it a different way. That is such clever word play!

The next stanza features a ton of alliteration in each line, and I loved reading them. It made the stanza flow very well. I also liked the use of "medley." I only heard that word associated with music, so I was intrigued to know that there was another definition of it.

I mentioned the juxtaposition above, so I won't repeat that. I love the metaphors that you sprinkled throughout the poem, like "stretch". Comparing the wilted garden to a grave in the fourth stanza added sorrow to this sad reality.

Closing Graham Cracker - Closing Thoughts
This was a wonderful poem! I enjoyed reading it very much. I love how you integrated all these literary devices into a short poem. They added a deep richness into about something as small as tomatoes. Thank you for sharing this!

Valkyria

Hello! Ley here to review this delightful work for you. Today, I’ll be using my 'Autumn-Themed Review Template'! We’ll begin with my initial impressions, then delve into the aspects that stood out like the vibrant hues of fall, and then get into the critiques. I hope you find this review insightful, and that you're enjoying the cozy charm of autumn, wherever you are in the world! Let’s dive in!

The First Signs of Autumn
Hey Mint! I love veggie poetry/anything veggie related so I thought I'd stop by and give you my thoughts on this amazing poem. I haven't read one of your poems in a while, so I'm glad that you decided to post this one :3 Alrighty, let's get into it!

A Golden Harvest

i reach down
to ma toes
and s t r e t c h
into tomorrow.

This is my favorite stanza in the whole poem because it really reminds me of the birth of a plant, which is what I'm guessing you're trying to convey here! I just loved how you extended the word 's t r e t c h" to exaggerate the verse, and it didn't fail! I found myself smiling at this stanza so much :3

perhaps next spring, i can try again.
but it's a long time to may
and it is too easy
to forget.

...somehow, still,
the soil salutes the seed.

Ahhh! The ending was perfect. I know that you used tomatoes somewhat as a metaphor throughout this piece, but I believe there's so many ways to interpret this poem. I saw it as a reminder that you can always try again, even when the leaves are withered and the soil is full of my remnants. Like, life will get better with time. I'm sorry if this isn't what you intended through this poem, but I did find it truly beautiful. <3
[quote]

Wilted Leaves and Crisp Critiques
I have no suggestions! <3

Cozy Conclusion
Thank you so much for sharing this. I love your poetry and I miss it, so please post more! I hope you have a lovely day, and happy RevMo!

Hiya, mint!

I am so so happy that we are writing tomato poems now. <3 Ah! So lovely!

I want to begin at the ending for a second because I absolutely LOVE your last two lines:

...somehow, still,
the soil salutes the seed.

The comma placement and the alliteration (which is so natural that it's subtle) just make it read so well. The soil salutes the seed. The way that hearkens back to the first stanza and also conveys this timeless peace is incredible. I adore it.

Okay, now to go back in order...

a seed is introduced to the earth.
i imagine whispered greetings,
the slow transformation of a hole into a home.

I love how the beginning is so simple. It makes everything that follows all the more marvelous. I also like the introduction of the narrator, because it's not just about the tomatoes and seeds and soil, but also how the narrator envisions them and has a relationship with them, and I think that's neat.

On the last line, I do like the idea of turning a hole into a home, but I think for a minute hole made me slightly confused because I was picturing a seed in some sort of hollow space in the earth instead of all tightly wrapped up. For that reason, part of me thinks it would be cool to say "transformation of a hole into a hug," just for the imagery of the soil really surrounding the seed, but! I love your version too!

i reach down
to ma toes
and s t r e t c h
into tomorrow.

A-dorable. Love how you put tomatoes in there. I like the creativity in this little stanza, but it doesn't quite fit the tone of the rest of the poem. Reading "to ma toes" the way it's written instead of "tomatoes" gives it a more... casual? folksy? feeling, and s t r e t c h is using visual elements that aren't in the rest of the poem, either.

That's totally alright because the tomato's perspective is different from the narrator's, and this section is in italic, but I guess the one thing is that when we hit the little italic stanza at the end, that part doesn't feel like the tomato's voice. So I guess I was expecting the two to match voice because they're both in italics, but since they didn't, this stanza sticks out a little. I wonder if the last stanza could be not in italics, or if the middle one could be indented or something, because I kept expecting to hear from the tomato again!

in a far-fetched future,
there'll be a motley medley of
tomatoes, taking their time,
growing in the garden.

Ooh, and what a medley of alliteration you have here! Like I said about the closing stanza, subtle enough that it didn't stick out to me on the first read, which is great. It just feels really organic but is doing a lot to support the sort of lilt of the poem and the imagery. <3

in a probable reality,
withered brown remnants
are the solitary residents
of this solemn, soil-covered grave.

I like how you immediately follow up with a contrasting stanza. At first, I wondered, "why far-fetched?" But, seeing my own garden, I believe that I am also engaged in this more "probably reality." XD It's pretty sad to see the tomato we've just seen finding a home and stretching out become "withered brown remnants" at a grave :/ But, I think the way you end leaves us with plenty of hope for regrowth!

perhaps next spring, i can try again.
but it's a long time to may
and it is too easy
to forget.

I felt like this stanza might have been the weakest? It feels to me a little like it's missing something. It's definitely a very honest and realistic stanza, and that works well with the way you end the poem: the soil still salutes the seed, despite the forgetfulness of our narrators.

But it feels maybe almost too blunt? Like the narrator who can imagine whispered greetings after (tenderly?) placing a seed in the soil might have some more whimsy, or more sadness for their own forgetfulness and the death of the tomato, or more of a hopeful/dreaming quality. I guess we don't know much about them XD but I'm just trying to pinpoint what I thought wasn't there.

It didn't really have a negative impact on the poem, though! It's still fantastic. It was just a really slight thing that I noticed more on a second read-through.

Anyway, I really really enjoyed this poem. My own tomatoes have been having a tough summer due to my own forgetfulness in watering and such, and this is just a very sweet and relatable poem. And looking back at the title, it makes a lot of sense to call it tomorrow's tomatoes, considering the way you examine two potential futures. And really, with the emphasis on the seed, this poem is all about potential and future growth and anticipation. I really like that. It's anticipation, but the outcome might not be what we want it to be, just like life.

But, "somehow, still, / the soil salutes the seed." <3 Not sure how you said this so perfectly but I am still enchanted by these lines.

-Q