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Music

by LucytheBrave


Every day is the same and every night a bore. The same monotone rhythm, tick-tock as time passes. Tired voices and weary eyes, distant, distracted greeting I return with a smile, my eyes weary like theirs. Then I take a breath, slip in my earbuds,and fade away.

The music starts. Slow, piano keys. Long notes, short breaths. My heart swells, anticipating. A single voice, almost a whisper. A hum, underneath it all. Strings layer in, echoing. Then the piano grows stronger, faster. The sound grows wider, fuller. Guitar strings clash, and the voice gets louder. Fervent, breathless phrases fill my ears. A drum beat, pulsing against the song. It gets louder and my mind runs wild. The choir joins in and so do I, pulled into the sound, torn from reality by the insistent tug of the bass. I run alongside their joyful voices, flying through the rises and falls, like mountains and valleys in my head. I can feel the sound getting bigger, growing until they are almost screaming... And then it fades away. A duet, a discordant harmony, and that alone. My soul sinks back into my body, back to reality again. 

The music stops...

And starts again. 


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Mon May 14, 2018 8:47 pm
SnowGhost says...



I love The Greatest Showman and I really love this.<3
It's just such a nice piece to read. :)




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Mon May 14, 2018 3:53 pm
LadyAstella wrote a review...



This is amazing, so intense, emotional, and so so relatable! Music is such an inspiration to many people. You just took that inspiration and turned into a writing. If you turned this into an emotion, it would be what people feel about music. Just amazing, I can see music is such a huge part of your life....Keep it that way. You are such a greater writer and I look forward to more your work.

Lady Astella




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Mon May 14, 2018 2:15 pm
Jevan13 wrote a review...



This was absolutely beautiful. The poem pulsated with emotional energy, feeding itself into my mind and compelling me to relate to it. "I run alongside their joyful voices, flying through the rises and falls, like mountains and valleys in my head. I can feel the sound getting bigger, growing until they are almost screaming... And then it fades away. A duet, a discordant harmony, and that alone. My soul sinks back into my body, back to reality again." This had to be my favorite section as it brings out so many emotions and vivid imagery. It effectively combines sound and image to make this into a worthwhile experience. Keep it up.




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Mon May 14, 2018 5:32 am
Eve wrote a review...



I am in LOVE with Greatest Showman songs! It is the GREATEST MUSIC EVER!!!!!!!!!! My choir is singing 'the greatest show' in our show's finale and, not to brag, but we are doing a pretty amazing job (with the help of drum corp. and wind symphony(and a stinking amazing choreographer).
I TOTALLY relate to this poem/ paragraph, it's like a fire is in my heart and pulsing with adrenaline heat.
"I can feel the sound getting bigger, growing until they are almost screaming... And then it fades away. A duet, a discordant harmony, and that alone. My soul sinks back into my body, back to reality again. " Amazingly well-said, but the word 'screaming' makes it sound as if it is unpleasant or you're covering your ears. Maybe you could say "I can feel the sound getting bigger, growing until the sound fills me..." It'd sound much more pleasant and desirable than screaming.
Other than that, it's amazing, you really have a way of capturing your feelings and making them easy for a reader to understand and have sympathies with.




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Mon May 14, 2018 5:00 am
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shaniac wrote a review...



Shaniac here to review this! This is my first ever review on this site, so forgive me if I get anything wrong.

I love the Greatest Showman. It's probably one of the many musicals I'd like to see before I forgot when I'm older, just cause the music really does change your perspective on life and whatnot. Your poem does show this in different descriptions and how the narrator is feeling when they put on their earbuds.

Besides all of that, I would suggest maybe formatting this poem differently. Poems, that I have read, usually are in stanza format and have poetic themes that are sprinkled throughout. This poem doesn't really fit me as a poem but instead a short, short story type of deal? Though, this could be a new type of poem that I have never seen before. Either way, I think you tell, instead of show in some parts, also. What I mean by that is you are not describing what is happening but instead telling us what is going on. With poetry, whoever is reading this should be able to feel what the narrator is feeling.

The ending kind of just comes to a close. You could potentially continue it on with not "the music stops..." but instead, "the song shuffles/the experience starts over again" or something similar.

Anyway, as a recap, I think you should touch up this poem here and there. I really do like how the narrator imagines being transported to the song. Really kind of brings out the true meaning of this. Have a good day/night!





Doubt thou the stars are fire, doubt that the sun doth move. Doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love.
— "Hamlet," William Shakespeare