Purple Memories
Blue skies pass by and fade,
The day sets peacefully.
Echoing in the heavens,
Prayers turn into stars.
Sailing across an ocean of danger,
Far away from my safe, warm self.
Crying in hidden forests of gold,
Birds of paradise show their pride.
If my long lost memories were dyed purple,
Would I ever see a clearer view...
Will it ever melt away a heart of sorrow,
Will light ever shine down a dark, raging land?
The sun skips down a cold mountain,
Hope's angels of light sing in the distance.
In a sea of drifting paper boats,
I fly into an orchard of fading souls.
My guilt-ridden soul embraces the dark forcefully,
But my heart is somewhere in infinity.
Drenched in memories dyed in deep purple,
Will I be able to see my true self
In your eyes?
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125,011 Literary Works • 672,841 Reviews
I really like the last few lines:
" Drenched in memories dyed in deep purple,
Will I be able to see my true self
In your eyes?"
. . . Often how I feel, often how I wonder, "how do others see me?"
Your poem leads the reader to wonder, to imagine, to think, to feel. Dear poet, write on (and on and on and on . . .)
Mhm, this is good, I agree with the others. I think you really have a talent for setting the scene and for creating some good imagery that makes the reader feel like they are part of the poem; that's really good!
I like your word choice and the structure helped along with the flow, rhythm and beat, making it seem more like a poem and less like someone reading out a news report.
Good work,
Mischief x
Amazing. I agree that the verse order could be changed. The 'dark raging land' interupts the dream-like flow a bit. Great use of imagery, you've managed to use a collection of abstract ideas to make an overall image that sticks in my mind even after i've finished reading. Kudos.
Ooooh... some really nice stuff in here.
Actually, I think the third stanza would be the best starting point for this. So:
If my long lost memories were dyed purple,
Would I ever see a clearer view...
Will it ever melt away a heart of sorrow,
Will light ever shine down a dark, raging land?
...would be your first stanza. And I like it because it states the purpose of your poem in such breathtaking imagery that it's pretty awesome. While your first two stanzas were okay, they were filled with adjectives and cliches, so the third stanza was much better.
And I LOVED the imagery of "drifting paper boats." Really remarkable stuff.
So keep at it!