I toss and turn around, all tangled in sheets
trying to relax my brain
and to visit the sweet phase of oblivion.
But just my luck,
unconsciousness doesn't come that easily,
well at least not to me.
Every night my brain seems like its running a marathon
of random cringe-y memories
Causing me to flinch at evey single one of them.
*
"Get a grip girl"
I tell my self.
"Jus close your eyes, sleep will eventually come"
But that's the thing about not being able to sleep,
it demands to be felt.
*
Sometimes I wonder
if at all I could have turned nocturnal.
Is such a thing humanly possible?
Or maybe I am a hybrid of an owl and a human,
I mean I do have big eyes and a tendency to not sleep at night.
But I cannot turn my neck at a 180° angle.
So no maybe, not an owl.
Maybe I turned into one of those lab experiments terribly gone wrong?
That's quite the possibility.
*
I sleep in school all morning,
and lay awake in bed all night.
I think about those who say,
"As soon as I hit the bed I was out like a light"
wish I was one of them.
Every night it is a constant battle between me and sleep
And I ultimately have to take pills
So that I can sleep. Even if for some hours.
*
Dark circles surround my eyes.
I feel tired. But sleep just wouldn't come so easily.
I'm tired of always being tired
cuz being tired is really tiring.
I wish I could sleep like a normal human
For 6 to 7 hours daily.
But of course sleep just wouldn't come to me that easily.
*
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,008 Literary Works • 672,832 Reviews
Okay!
Hello Demi! I loved your poem! It was really awesome! Pardon me I couldn't get the TOP reference much, I really don't listen to them regularly, bet my sister could, she's obsessed! xD
First of all, I like the flow you have in your poem, it's well organized and thus, easy to read and connect.
A typo in the last line, "Every".
Now, this stanza makes a grand opening. You've taken a situation and described further, phase by phase, also with a very relatable topic- which is genius as well. You see, I was told recently, when you've gotta tell a story, make sure people can relate and feel what you are feeling. It'll let them have a look at the world like you do. People don't mind words much, if something matters, it's the way you made them feel. And, as a writer, it's important for authors to let the readers connect, which you've done brilliantly. I can relate most to the memory part. Seriously, memories seem to dance like monsters at night times! xD It's not grand.
This stanza!! Hahaha! Nice imagery!
A little typo in the last line "Come to". And, yes, that's almost it. I loved it and I don't think I've any suggestions for you based on grammar or structure. So, amazingly written! Keep writing!
Thanx mialy
I really liked this and can totally relate to it! Awesome poem!
Thanx ash
Your welcome!
Is the title a Twenty One Pilots song reference???
Yep
OMFG YEY
TOP?
I'm obsessed
Hi, DivergentDemigod! I am almost 100% positive that most people can relate to this. I know I definitely can. Here are some grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc., corrections:
1. On the first line on the poem there should be a comma after 'sheets'.
2. "I'm tired of always breing tired"
('breing' should be spelled 'being')
3. "caz being tired is really tiring."
('caz' should be 'cuz' and it looks as if there is an extra space in between tired and is.)
Well that's all that I noticed! And I hope you have a nice day!
-5kKitty
Ok thanx ... I'll fix them