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Young Writers Society



nausea for the shipwrecked

by Chevy


This is not fair. I don't see why I can never write like this...never.

Sorry but no critiquing for this poem...it was great.

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Wed Jun 29, 2005 6:58 pm
Caligula's Launderette wrote a review...



hmmm...I really liked this poem.

My favorites lines are these "Apartments are pretty when the sun paints us gold
and we spend our days dancing alone"

the imagery in this is amazing. once again you are who blows are minds away with your gift.

cheers
CL




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Tue Jun 28, 2005 10:04 am
Elizabeth says...



I had to aggree with Sam... I was about to say the line sounded funny...)
Lovely job though.




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Tue Jun 28, 2005 4:14 am
Sam says...



"Apartments are pretty when the sun paints us gold"

Only line that seemed out of place. Other than that: meditative, beautiful even. Loved the bathroom bit.

(but who wants to watch church on tv? *shudder)




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Mon Jun 27, 2005 4:09 pm
Firestarter says...



You like the word cliche, don't you?

Oh, and, good stuff, especially the first two lines.





Maybe I should say something quote-worthy, like, I dunno... "You can only be happy if you decide to be happy?"
— Necromancer14