Different.
Such a common word,
Meant to be nothing really.
Just a word.
That’s it.
.
But different is bad.
Different is fatal.
Different means torture.
.
To be different
is to be unnatural.
Disgusting, impure.
.
Being called different
is a curse.
Worse than being
vain, shallow, mean.
.
But this is a lie.
Being different is beautiful;
being different is a
blooming flower.
.
Being different is
being a shiny quartz,
in a pile of pebbles.
.
Being different means to
stand out,
to have the courage to
be free.
.
To be different
is to be great.
Powerful.
.
Embrace the differences,
for all else
who would we be?
.
Difference is beautiful,
difference is unique.
Do not let anyone
take that from thee.
.
Oh and p.s.
it's okay to be unique.
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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125,013 Literary Works • 672,842 Reviews
For starters, I like the title. Different IS okay. It is not saying that different can be okay, or that different might be okay, but that it has been, is, and will always be okay.
Secondly, I really like the stanza that compares being different to being a shiny quartz in a pile of pebbles. It feels like society views it the other way around most days.
Hola! Coma estas?
These are really good comparisons, and these are thought people actually have when they get made fun of for being different. And different can be so many things to every person which is why this poem is easy to relate to and can be very emotionally effective.
Also very true. Way to mention the backwards way society looks at being unique, being yourself. This poem has a subtle sort of power behind it like a kid who's willing to be bullied no more!
So true. It definitely takes courage, but once you free yourself, it's liberating.
BOOM! You hit it!
I don't really get this, it's phrased kind of awkwardly.
The poem wasn't rhyming before but this is a rhyme, and the language is a different type . The "thee" is more old school as well so it feels generally out of place like: "Where did that come from?"
I get what you're trying to do here, but I don't think it's necessary. if you take this out I think the other stanza would work better, and has a stronger ending point, just a suggestion.
Overall it was a good poem and a good concept. The things to fix are minor.
To be honest the title hooked me because I also see difference as a good thing because wouldn't it be just so boring and creepy if we were all the same. I like the poem, it has an outlook on how/the truth of the world/ slash humanity see uniqueness even when they tell us it's okay to be different. I also feel as though I should say thank you since it also feels like your giving a lighthearted speech to us readers/reviewers.
Hey Canda!
~ I notice that shortly into the poem, you stop capitalizing every line. I recommend you stay consistent-- and either drop the capitalization here, or continue it throughout the entire poem. I don't quite understand this line: 'Meant to be nothing really'.Shady here with a review for you this fine evening. c:
I will take this poem stanza by stanza, and give a general overview at the end.
"Different.
Such a common word,
with such a common meaning.
Just a word." ~A possible alternative, if that's what you meant.
~ How do you mean? Fatal for who? Torture for who? Fatal to the 'ideal' projection of a perfect society-- predictable and boring? Torture to a dictator who would choose to understand the way his subjects behaved? Torture to a society of kids groomed to be the same, and to find different distasteful? Torture to someone who is different, and therefore repressed and scorned?
~ Very nice. You paint a good, clear picture.
~ Again, the question rises: who feels this way?
~ I'm not sure I'm digging the first line. Your imagery was good, up to this point. This just seems a bit flat. Not sure what to suggest, though.
~ misplaced comma, I'd say. If you say it, you don't say "Being different is being a shiny quartz...in a pile of pebbles." There is no pause.
~ *Very* nice. This is my favorite stanza so far.
~
"To be different
is to be great.
To be powerful." Might be a better flow.
~ I do not understand.
~
"Your difference is your beauty,
and that beauty is unique.
Do not let anyone take,
That difference away."
Okay, so my edit isn't the best in the world. But I don't really like the 'thee'. You don't use 'thee's and 'thou's and other old Elizabethan English *anywhere* else, and it feels out of place.
~ Not really digging this, either. You equated the difference with uniqueness, and have been praising difference. So if difference is unique, and difference is good, unique is therefore also good. Yes, I did just bring my logic proofs into a review.
~
Okay! Over all, I really liked this poem. I wholeheartedly agree with the message behind it, and like the way you wrote it, for the most part. I hope this review wasn't too harsh, or too long. I tend to leave long reviews on pieces that I really like. c:
If you need any more help, or have any questions, don't hesitate to PM or wall me.
Keep writing!
~Shady
Hi there! I love the message of this poem. I like how it has a refined style, so I can tell that you thought a lot about punctuation. In poetry, you have to remember that punctuation is not a normal thing, so when using it, make sure it makes a statement. In the beginning, I felt like you were struggling trying to find synonyms for difference. The poem improved when you were describing difference by using metaphors
"Being different is
being a shiny quartz,
in a pile of pebbles."
This stanza stood out to me because it was a change in style and I liked it.