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Re: My Love
Haha dude. Nice work there. There are quite a lot of grammatical mistakes. I hope you don't mind me pointing them out for you. 1."My heart fluttered as a smile ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: As hard as hearts
First up, I liked the poem. A three and a half out of five for sure. Moving on to some of the things the poem can improve upon : "I ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Still want me too
wow! :) this is gonna be something close to my heart. The most relatable read I have had over here. Even though I am a guy and I am not ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Spirit Unleashed
I had a lord of the rings feeling going on throughout reading this. The prologue makes it sound like just another fiction. I would certainly hope that your literary style ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: A New Life
I think the second stanza does not really go with the rhyme scheme which makes it sound a bit odd when reading the poem. I just love poems with a ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: The 12 Spirits Intro
Too many full stops mean you end up using 'I' so many times. I wonder if you can find a way to connect some of the sentences to eliminate the ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Lighter
Unique for lyrics. Do you hate commas? :P The last part is just repetitive and it's written more like a paragraph :/ I really don't believe "I am a lighter ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: A Good Day to Twi-Hard
As they say, all good things come to an end yeah? I wonder how the hatred towards the movies made you dislike the book. That should not really be the ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: homestuck fanfic: the pink blood {part one}
No hate comments here buddy, don't worry :). I would just like to point out how there a lots of spelling mistakes and no punctuation what so ever. It's quite ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Kyteline
It's kind of very straight forward. I know, it's supposed to be a short story but still I think you can take your time to describe some stuff, like kimber's ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Schedule ~A Mother's Day Poem~
I was wondering what this poem tries to convey exactly. Maybe how you mom is there for you through your weeks? But it's a cute poem. I like how you ...
May 11, 2013 -
Re: Who's Love? (Revised)
Something I can associate to on such a large scale. It is exactly the case with the girl I am with right now and the girl who I desire so ...
May 10, 2013 -
Re: Forever Waiting
this poem for some strange reasons really touches me. I tend to get a mixed feeling about the theme really. But then again that's what you probably want to convey. ...
May 10, 2013
