ohhewwo

mmmmmmm ... pie ...

...really, really short, this entry. But, actually, you've sort of got me hooked already, and I'm not sure why. But, keep going!!!

That's pretty interesting. Judging just from that, you might be a good fantasy writer. I don't have any problems with it. Good job.

The writing is good, but the storyline was just...nothing special. That's all I can really say. How old was this?

Ummm ... this thread has been dead for a while now. We all just kinda stopped posting ...

It was ... alright, at best. I mean, it was a good piece, but, it didn't really have anything special goin' for it, you know? I see what your saying, ...

They do have pretty interesting lyrics, but, you know, I just can't seem to get into their music. Ecspecially their vocalist. His voice is too ... ughthhangthgahhhhhh ... you know? ...

Thanks for the crit emotion_less. And geez, it's freakin' drama ... gosh ... you always have to analyze stuff ... it's so annoying ... I hate you ... just kidding ...

Not many stories can make me as sad as this. Well done. This was an interesting way to illustrate their life as lovers. I could tell that you had put ...

... That's pretty wierd. But I enjoyed it. It made me laugh. But I did have to copy and paste it and blow it up to read it. If you ...

Well, technically it is freeverse, because not all of the stanzas have the same amount of lines. Freeverse poetry always has the same rhyme scheme in each stanza (for instance, ...

It is an interesting story. It's kind of in that style that sounds like someone is actually telling it to you. I'll be looking forward to a continuation. Oh yeah, ...

That's cute ... just kiddin' ...

Yeah, it is possible to be over-descriptive (as I have found out), and this is only a small part of the first chapter. I didn't realize how small the piece ...

Yeah, it really was awesome. Very well put.