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Re: oculus reparo
I believe it's perfectly alright for me to want to cry, correct? I've decided That it's okay for me to want to do that. I highly appreciate the realness in ...
Jun 10, 2015 -
Re: Oh...sweet Carcosa. Let the King bless you in his magnificent yellow...
So A few things I noticed: "It was a normal day, where I found the book" Unless I read this line wrong (which I'm thinking I might have), I was ...
Jun 9, 2015 -
Re: Summer Nights
Oh yes. You're in love, that's all I can say. This is a love story. There' a lot about your work, and I absolutely adore it. I cannot find anything. ...
Jun 4, 2015 -
Re: Handsoap
There are too many things with this. I don't even know what emotions I have while reading this. I love this work. I fell in love with it, and just ...
Jun 4, 2015 -
Re: Burning Bridges
I was expecting a better flow...but then I realized...flow doesn't matter with this piece. It was written how it was, and I absolutely love it. By the end, when I ...
Jun 4, 2015 -
Re: Sulli 1
Okay. Overall, I liked it. The only part that confused me was int the beginning, which is not good. This: "Sulli was not prepared for Rynth. It was too much. ...
Jun 2, 2015 -
Re: Prologue
Your use of synonyms are pretty good, but intermediate. I can tell you're stretching yourself, kind of going out of your comfort zone a bit. But did you know that ...
Jun 2, 2015 -
Re: My empire
Yowzah. I love this. This is so nice and breathy. There's only one thing: "...I didn't felt." I'm not sure what you meant by this. I was curious as to ...
May 31, 2015 -
Re: Felling Fire
Really sexy, this. I have to say, the imagery is so original and diverse. It's like I'm taken to many different scenes all in one sitting. So good. But like, ...
May 31, 2015 -
Re: My Guardian Angel Once Walked Upon The Earth
Hello, dear! A few things: "I think of the person who acted like a mast." I would suggest changing the end of that, as it ruins the flow of writing. ...
May 31, 2015 -
Re: Dear Future Kid: A Letter
This letter is honest. Brutal, and real refreshing. I don't appreciate those who think problems are something to hide, or even just dramatize them (they somehow make them so dramatized, ...
May 29, 2015 -
Re: I am
There are several things 1. Who is this person? 2. They have quite a strong self esteem. 3. But at the same time, I perceive a bit of weakness in ...
May 29, 2015 -
Re: I promise, my darling
A cute little ditty overall. I appreciate how small and to the point it is. I really like the "promise-always-never" Pattern you have written here, yet as a conclusion, you ...
May 29, 2015 -
Re: The Fair Elf Princess
To be honest, this story did not grip me. From the first mention of the character's name, how you immediately threw your reader into the story unannounced by saying 'You. ...
May 28, 2015 -
Re: Everyone Needs a True Friend
Real quaint. I have some personal thoughts about this work, but I will keep these (for they are of my personal experience) until the end. I agree with 'Darklord' on ...
May 28, 2015
