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Re: deus ex machina
Hello, Phantasm! Hope you are doing well! I find this poem exhilarating - and what a banger of a first line. Really grabbed my attention, which, is unfortunately, slippery these ...
Aug 1, 2025 -
Re: On Breezy Days When the Veil Seems Thinner
This is stunning. Absolutely stunning. That first line took my breath away. I think one of the best things about poetry is how it can my physical things feel unstable ...
Apr 3, 2023 -
Re: The Restless Statue
I love the concept so much, and it is beautiful executed. Here are some thoughts: I don't know if it would mess up your syllable count or meter ( I ...
Apr 3, 2023 -
Re: The Hitchhiker
This is so good! The writing is excellent, and the story feels very cohesive. I love all the details... the marigolds, the music... Here are my notes: I don't think ...
Mar 31, 2023 -
Re: Tree of Life
"There is a prayer that is said after the vows." Oh my goodness, that line is stunning! It was such philosophical and poetic weight. I still feel it echoing in ...
Jan 14, 2022 -
Re: Still
I love the line breaks. It gives the piece such a unique rhythm! I also love how you merge concrete imagery and philosophical ideas like in the lines "limitless potential/ ...
Jan 14, 2022 -
Re: They answer my questions with confident lies
Hello, I was very intrigued by this piece. Sometimes unique formatting can be used to make up for lack of interesting content or imagery, but here I feel like it ...
Jan 13, 2022 -
Re: Impermanence
From that opening line, you really got me thinking. This whole piece feels kind of timeless. It's elusively allegorical. I actually really love it. I love the tone and the ...
May 24, 2021 -
Re: Thoughts of an Adult
I related to this, even though I'm in a different stage of growing up (I am going to college next year). Your essay felt tender and honest, sad, but oddly ...
May 22, 2021 -
Re: A Ball of Twine
I feel like this is written in the vague lyrical prose of a riddle, or morality tale. On one hand, I really like this, it gets me to think. On ...
May 14, 2021 -
Re: fingernails
I really loved how you played with space in this piece. I could feel the "two conflicting points" throughout the poem, dancing with each other, woven together. It's very cool ...
May 13, 2021 -
Re: the tragedy of all of us
Beautiful, chilling... "skeleton-peeking-through-skin-afternoons" Is an astonishingly strong, visceral image (I am a huge fan of creating really long nouns from dashes) I also love the way you begin t
May 9, 2021 -
Re: The Storm
Excellent! This piece is engaging and evocative. I could feel the setting and it really helped me get inside the protagonist's head I really liked the cascade of effects: "It ...
May 9, 2021 -
Re: To feed the soul of the Poet-Angler
This is absolutely brilliant! I love how abstract, yet relatable it is. We all know that particular pattern class notes follow. The way we are taught to analyze ideas and ...
May 9, 2021 -
Re: To Tomorrow
Hi, I love the breathless way in which you characterize time. I think your unconventional line breaks really serve this well. I like your use of imagery as well. It ...
Apr 15, 2021
