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TakeThatYouFiend

TakeThatYouFiend

  • Short Story » Humor, General Re: I Would Like To Behead the King

    Loved it. True, to be fair, it really needs to be done script format, which would make it quite a lot clearer, but that might ruin some of the jokes. ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, Technology Re: Emergency Google Search

    Ok this was kinda an awesome story, and it really is a brilliant idea, and I only really have two points to criticize. The point she realized she was a ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Short Story » Action / Adventure, Mystery / Suspense Re: A Certain Set Of Skills (Title Pending)

    Wow! When's the sequel? Right I'm gonna go ahead with a little constructive criticism if I may. The second paragraph had me re-reading a bit, particularly in the bit saying ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Spiritual, Narrative Re: I Daresay I'm Brilliant

    You will quite surely raise to fame, for you have unlocked the secret of success in the poetic world: and that is telling everyone how brilliant you are. It worked ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Other » Satire, Other Re: Tabernacular!

    This is a very nice idea, and on I have heard many a time on I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue, where they also have my personal favorite: Flatulence, and ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Critiquing Woes

    This was quite a nice poem, but I am rather intrigued by your rhyming pattern. It seems strange to have AAB BCC, if this is indeed what thr rhyming pattern ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Adam

    I take this as a challenge to review. Challenge accepted. The title is quite pure and self evident in meaning. It is a single word almost suggesting wholeness, the complete ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Calm

    Ok this piece was amazing, and it is with great regret that I inform you that I only have two pieces of constructive criticism. :-( The first piece isreferring to ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Romantic, Horror Re: Love Song

    I got interested in this work when you mentioned it was rap like, and just from that point of view I have a couple of minor criticisms. Nothing to big, ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Narrative, Realistic Re: ...

    O.k. this was quite lovely, and I find it hard to give any criticism at all. But I've had lots of nit-picky practice, so I hope I'm not to harsh, ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Poetry » Realistic, Other Re: This is the School of Chaos

    Ok, lovely concept, but I think it could do with a few tweeks. First off, Ungleeful is a forced rhyme. Not only that, but it doesn't rhyme. This is the ...

    Aug 31, 2014
  • Short Story » Humor, Mystery / Suspense Re: Illusionary Murder

    O.k. first off automatic like for writing in second person! I have read several solo role playing gamebooks so I am experienced in second person storytelling. First criticism: In your ...

    Aug 28, 2014
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Statue of a Young Woman

    This is a very nice poem, I'm afraid I only have a couple of nitpicks to offer. But before I do, might I just complement your rhythm here. Although you ...

    Aug 11, 2014
  • Poetry » Humor, Satire Re: A Writer's Hand

    Good day there good madam/sir! You have had the misfortune to write a piece just in my genre, so apologies if I seem a little harsh at all. I'll take ...

    Jul 24, 2014
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Fragrant Rose

    O.k. so there was a really sweet refrain here, and only a couple of things I would change, nothing grammatical or anything like that. Firstly you appear to have attempted ...

    Jul 23, 2014


Be steadfast as a tower that doth not bend its stately summit to the tempest’s shock.
— Dante Alighieri