Rydia

Oooh. I love the idea of this and the title is brilliant. I'd love to know why they're burning the house down (or is it just a pile of wood) ...

What you have is great but it's much too short to be a complete poem. Your imagery is pretty, you have a good vocabulary and the rhyme is effective but ...

You have a nice, sophisticated style but I am dying for some more description of the characters. The setting is brilliant, your dialogue is engaging and in general, this was ...

In general, this is a bit of an info dump, even for a prologue and it's also very short so why not split some of that information up with description ...

Hmmm. I think you have quite a good flow here and the lyrics are nice if a bit strange but you seriously need to add some punctuation and shorten a ...

I get the feeling that you haven't quite finished this but what you have so far is nice. Maybe tidy it up a little - (Lucky) "Charlie . Why did ...

You have some nice imagery, a good theme and a lovely style of writing but some of the lines need a bit of work. Here's a few suggestions - There ...

Okay, this is rather short so my first piece of advice is to extend it and my second is to add grammar. Lots and lots of grammar. Here's a quick ...

It's certainly rather unique but I think it could be imrpoved. You repeat bird too much and that's rather vague so maybe mention what sort of bird it is. Perhaps ...

An excellent essay and I'm not sure if you're looking for ways to improve it seenas you've handed it in but I can give you a few suggestions and you ...

Ah, a good end to the chapter. Just the one point to make - Gently, the mist trailed down from the tree and let [s]it's[/s] its large, green burden down ...

Oooh. This is a great start to the chapter! Have I told you how brilliant you are at creating and developing loveable characters? I can't wait for the romances to ...

I thought this part was pretty good and much easier to understand than certain previous chapters. Lol. Anyway, some typos I spotted - He wrenched the covers off of himself ...

In general, this needs to be extended, you need to add more description, more action, more plot, more everything before I can give you a propper critique. One piece of ...

Hi there Misty! So I don't think your poetry is as awesome as your short stories but no worries, this is the right place to get some tips on improving ...