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Re: Fury in the Wind chp 9 - Friend or Foe
Ok, so now I really think Kenway did something to his traveling companion, Reginald. His defensive reaction, his evasiveness, and his guilt all, to me, point toward him being at ...
Aug 1 -
Re: Fury in the Wind chp 8 - The Lone Rider
I think this is the strongest chapter yet that I've read. Once again, I really like the different names given to the environment: the Agressi Mountains, the Gnofen River, Holden's ...
Aug 1 -
Re: Fury in the wind chp 6 - Stumbling Through the Woods
Is this maybe supposed to be chapter 4 to Fury in the Wind? It's not included in the folder for it, so maybe it was misposted? Anyways, I think it ...
Aug 1 -
Re: Fury in the Wind chp 7 - The Final Straw
I like the transition from the previous chapter to this one. The previous chapter was about a group of military men travelling through a desert. Here, we're in a small ...
Aug 1 -
Re: Fury in the Wind chp 5 - Night Encampments
Hey Messenger! Starting a Chapter 5, but I'm going to do my best to read the rest of the chapters in order. I think you do a great job with ...
Aug 1 -
Re: The Door
Hey booklover1026! I think your story is a good example of flash fiction. It's a quick read with a small, self-contained plot. It's also a plot that any of us ...
Apr 5, 2025 -
Re: The Lie that Saved the World Chapter 9: The Council
I like how you ended the chapter with a couple questions directed toward the reader. That's actually really helpful. What did you think of the council? Do they come across ...
Mar 26, 2023 -
Re: What is an AL?
Hey! It sounds like this is perhaps to meant to be a prologue for a book. If so, I like the personal essay format for opening a book. It introduces ...
Mar 26, 2023 -
Re: Conqueror Rising: A Prologue [old]
Hey Snoink! I've had The Conqueror on my reading list for a few months now, and I'm finally getting down to reading it. It's probably unavoidable, but I tend to ...
Mar 26, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 22
I picked this story up near the end, so there's still a lot of details that aren't totally clear to me, but I feel like I have a good handle ...
Mar 6, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 21
What decision did Issac make!? I don't really mean that as a matter of suspense. I just don't think leaving that on an ambiguous note really works here. Even if ...
Feb 26, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 20
I feel like Alice! Definitely some strange stuff going on. Just to reiterate what I said earlier, I like how you're switching back and forth between beats in the action. ...
Feb 26, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 19
Hey! Finished chapters 17 and 18, and now reading chapter 19. I like how we're returning to Shadowscale after the Alice / Issac chapter, but it is a bit jarring ...
Feb 26, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 18
Hey Necromancer! I just finished Chapter 17, and I'm going to try to make my through the remaining chapters. So first, I really like how this opens. The last chapter ...
Feb 26, 2023 -
Re: The Cosmic Dragon: Chapter 17
Hey Necromancer! Like @LadySpark, I'm jumping into this in the middle, but I like what I'm reading. If I'm reading it correctly, this is set in a universe where dragons ...
Feb 26, 2023
