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JohnLocke1

John Locke

  • Short Story » Realistic, General Re: More of A Journal Than Anything [Edited]

    This made me very happy for some reason. It must be because your writing style mirrors my own, somewhat. I very much enjoyed your story, as well. It was very ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 1:21 am
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: Dark Blade Army

    I am an avid reader of Fantasy novels and I enjoy writing them as well. I consider them my specialty to review, so I am going to give you a ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 1:15 am
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Run

    Very interesting story idea. However, I felt as though it was very fast. I wanted to hear more about what Professor Blem, which is a fantastic name, did to this ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:48 am
  • Short Story » Dramatic, General Re: Stuck

    This was a very fast paced, confusing, and, at times, awkwardly written short story. If you are trying to work on description in your writing, this piece needs to be ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:41 am
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Residue

    Although there is not argument that your words are perfect and that you write beautifully, this does not seem like a short story to me. I feel as though it ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:31 am
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Walls

    Ok, the rhyming is out of control. Although beautiful poems have in the past had an intense rhyming scheme, it does not work in this poem. You need to be ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:25 am
  • Poetry » General, Other Re: The Thoughts of The Oldest

    Although I cannot give you the standard poetic review, I can give you my general impressions of this piece. People always think that poetry has to be dark and mysterious. ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:23 am
  • Poetry » General, General Re: bring me home

    Although I cannot give you a true poetic review, since I am not up to par with the review below mine, I can give you my general thoughts about this ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:19 am
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Fame

    I enjoy poems that are straight forward and too the point. This is one of those poems. You have easily conveyed emotions through just a few words and that, my ...

    Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:13 am
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, Romantic Re: Moving On

    I agree with Elinor. For the first chapter in a novel, this is surprisingly short. We are not given a good handle on the characters and I did not even ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:57 pm
  • Novel / Chapter » Fantasy, Action / Adventure Re: The Battalion Trilogy #1 - The First Chapter (Novel-in-Progress)

    This was far too heavy with dialogue. You need to give the reader time to breath. People often become overwhelmed with so much dialogue to keep track of. Also, with ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:38 pm
  • Poetry » Dramatic, Lyrical Re: To Baelia--

    Let me just say that I am a religious reader of Classical poetry. I loved the words of Sophocles, Christopher Marlowe, the Great Bard of Avon, of course. When I ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:30 pm
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Intertwined-Chapter two

    Grammar-wise, you need to go back and review this piece. I saw several errors that you probably just didn't see. I don't often focus on grammar in my reviews unless ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:15 pm
  • Novel / Chapter » Horror, Other Re: Z-Day

    For the opening of a story, this could use some description and explanation. Tell us more about this virus. What was the outcome of the outbreak? How did it affect ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 11:01 pm
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: John

    I haven't read any stories on this website about sports, so thank you for some originality! The first paragraph is completely useless to a reader unless you add some detail ...

    Mon Jan 07, 2013 10:45 pm


This is a house of homes, a sacred place, by human passion made divinely sweet.
— Alfred Joyce Kilmer