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Re: Not Free
Great poem; it was very enjoyable to read. I particularly enjoyed the last stanza. Alot of the poems I have been reading have last stanzas that divert to much from ...
May 31, 2011 -
Re: Dismay
Hey JackRussel, I really enjoyed your poem; it superbly conveyed dismay, your targeted emotion. I think it has the potential to be much more evokative, though. This is just a ...
May 31, 2011 -
Re: Lost at Sea
Great poem! I particularly enjoyed the imagery you use. You have some really killer lines, particularly the last line of each of the stanzas. For example, I loved the lines: ...
May 31, 2011 -
Re: God Loves You
I'm glad you have such strong faith! It wasn't preachy at all, it was beautiful. Your imagery, flow, pacing, was all flawless. I'll say it again, its an absolutley beautiful ...
May 31, 2011 -
Re: (insert interesting title here)
I like the duality in this poem, it is excellent--particularly in the lines: cut by fate and tied by destiny. Also in the line: Has been is will be Normally ...
May 30, 2011 -
Re: Yesterday
First off, I am naturally predisposed to love this poem because I alway love poems written in couplets. That being said, your poem is no exception. I particularly enjoyed the ...
May 15, 2011 -
Re: Title Totally Unrealted To The Song
This poem is excellent, and very accessable. My main critique would be that, because the lines are so short, the ryhmes become a little overwhelming. Their is plenty of room ...
May 15, 2011 -
Re: She Stands Alone
I agree with all of the above comments. The line He ignores her cries. seemed unnessissarily repiticious. I like the idea of having one line alone to contrast against the ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: deleted
Is there any special signifigance in Nine? It is a possible avenue you could consider expanding on-- like one heart for freindship, one for love, one for selflessness, etc. I ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: Happy Birthday, Teenager
The rhythm is perfect. The rhymes are all cleverly worded, it keeps the reader on their toes. I like the satiric overtones, mainly because it maintains that light upbeat feel ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: Evergreen
Cool poem. I think that the line Witness to what should never have been could be fixed if you change it to Witness to what never should have been or ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: Birds On a Wire
I love the use of detail. I also like how you waited till the last stanza to connect back to "I". The last line didn't really feel like it fit. ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: The precise and mighty
The emotions evoked were great. I got the "mighty" vibe, but not "precise". It seemed like you kind of just threw that in at the end. Also I wasn't sure ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: scribbles.
I love the way the end ties in to the beggining--it's perfect. The ending is really powerful. The one comment I would make is that, while there is no problem ...
May 1, 2011 -
Re: You Say
As stated by previous reviewers, the rythm is great. If you can condense You say I'm just stupid for thinking like this, I would, for purposes of flow. The couplets ...
May 1, 2011
