Emerson

Very interesting. First off I'll hit all the grammar bumps :D Distant sounds of cars passing, even at this hour, seem muted by the oppressive darkness; sounding hollower and lonely. ...

I'm never one for nature poetry, but a suggestion is to add more imagery, more sensory to it. What do the flowers smell like? look like? Feel like? How is ...

has lied to me, and lies I held so dear. I didn't like the last line of your chorus. You already mentioned lies, I think you should end on something ...

The first stanza started really well, with the pain of a cut and everything, I could feel it, but after that it started to go down hill... The big issue ...

This is actually very cute! Even with a simple rhyme scheme, and the simple theme, it's perfect. You are my night light, Make the monsters scream. I agree with Meep, ...

Stars and galaxies form from its wrath Forming a celestial tapestry The reuse of the verb "to form" didn't work so well here. Just as a grammar Nazi note: use ...

I think this has a lot of possibility, but a lot of space in between where it is and where it can be. I'm not even entirely sure what you ...

Hmm... I haven't to second Pros, though his first sentence seems terribly dramatic? heh. The issue with this is: what makes it a poem and not a story in a ...

This is a really cute poem. :) By the end, it was cheery. I think your flow from line to line was a little iffy, it just didn't flow nicely. ...

The real downfall of this poem is that the rhyming is so...bland. It really kills the poem. Rhyming is a good thing for poetry, but sometimes it can be over ...

It hasn’t snow for many years… this line doesn't make sense, your tenses are off. "It hasn't snow ed for many years..." is better. This is too depressing... But I ...

This seemed to fall into the oddest of ways. What does your lab have to do with the rest of the poem? I suppose I don't understand the meaning behind ...

I think the metaphor is a beautiful one, but it could be better expressed. After a while, your lines lose their potency. "Cold" is something very good for sensory image, ...

Uh, it was Ok? Your meaning was almost too obviously told, you know? Your last stanza made this too clear. It has no deeper meaning to it beyond that, and ...

I really, really loved some of the metaphors use used, they flowed beautifully, but in some places they were kind of cluttered: Dark air from [s]teh[/s] the smoldering [s]citgarettes[/s] cigarettes ...