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Elinor

Elinor

  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Sunset Magic

    Hello there, and welcome to YWS! Congratulations on writing your first non-rhyming poem! It can be a difficult challenge, can't it? Well, skimming through your poem, I'll say that you ...

    Mar 19, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Dont look away

    Hey there! Welcome to YWS! I think I'll have to agree with silented1 about the repetition. There are some cases in which I think it works to the benefit of ...

    Mar 18, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Worry

    Hi David! Welcome to YWS! I'll say, this poem was very nice. It kind of reminded me of the old, short version of the epic poems you would see in ...

    Mar 18, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Not sure what this is called yet

    Hi Dasia! I'll say that I agree with Suzanne about finding a title. Titles may not be everything in a piece, but they do help give the reader/reviewer a solid ...

    Mar 17, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Brother War

    Hiya Grin! Let's just say I'm impressed with you trying to tackle a villanelle; they're very hard to do, and you did quite a nice job! Like BenFranks said, it ...

    Mar 17, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Yours Truly

    Aww, Ben! This is an adorable piece of poetry. I love your imagery; it's very vivid. This poem does get a bit sappy at times, but it all adds to ...

    Mar 17, 2010
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: A is For

    Hello Clo! Like the others, I was very much impressed with this poem. This isn't one of my favorite poems on YWS, it's one of my favorite poems of all ...

    Mar 17, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Cinderella?

    As a hardcore fan of Cinderella, I will tell you know that I was quite impressed with this poem. You've got such vivid imagery, and when I read it, it ...

    Mar 17, 2010
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: All because of a boy. . .

    Hey Leyla! This was a really nice story, and I liked the overall feel of it. I don't really have much to say here, because people already all got the ...

    Mar 16, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Disguise

    Hiya there! I really liked this poem-it was nice, especially for your first attempt. However, I've see you've made the amateur mistake of not adding punctuation. If you get really ...

    Mar 16, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Headless Wisdom

    Hi Yoha! Ooh, this was a nice poem. It was short and sweet, with nice imagery, and you use a fresh, original concept-just the kind of poem that pleases me. ...

    Mar 16, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Why are you still here?

    Hi there. I'm not sure that I liked this too much. The subject as matter, as 'terrible' as it may seem, is actually quite annoying poetry cliche. Everyone's heard the ...

    Mar 16, 2010
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Lucas Said

    Hello there, herzing. This poem was not very good. It was lacking it almost all aspects; the grammar/punctuation, imagery, word choice, and the storytelling aspect. Your subject matter is cliche ...

    Mar 16, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: A Criminal's Heart-Prologue (REVISED)

    Hi shubhi! This was just, well okay. It's a nice start, but you're making a lot of amateur mistakes, and people have most already commented on those. I did, however, ...

    Mar 15, 2010
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Despicable

    Hi fixed! This seemed like an original and creative poem. I quite liked it-I would place it along with other gold poetry I've read here on YWS. Unlike the other ...

    Mar 15, 2010


"Growing up isn't the problem... forgetting is."
— Antoine de Saint-ExupĂ©ry, The Little Prince