Chaser

Hello there. Beginning this positive, this concept is captivating yet intriguing. But beware: class prejudice has been touched upon many times before, so be sure to keep the element of ...

Hello there. This chapter has some interesting information, but it feels like you left a bit out. This chapter could've been lengthened a bit with the following: How did Chase ...

Hello there. Let's begin with your lack of buildup. So much goes unexplained between chapters; it results in the story feeling rushed. I'll give you a few ideas to put ...

Well, one thing I have to say is, you're very Tallonted. *dodges brick thrown at head* Beginning with formatting, sadly, it's a bit confusing. The way this piece is written ...

Hello there. Beginning with strong points, your decadent description of John Stanley really captures the unsettling undertone of the piece. However, you may want to find alternate words for "wrenched.

Happy Review Day! Let's start with plot. You're doing an excellent job of incorporating mystery into your writing. The only advice I have is to revisit previous descriptions of the ...

Happy Review Day! Let's start with positives: imagery is excellent, characters are well-revealed through dialogue. Broaching your main issue: dialogue commas. The first issue is pretty straightforward

Happy Review Day! Disclaimer: I have not read any of your previous chapters. One day I may. But as of yet, I have not. Let's begin with plot. It's actually ...

Happy Review Day! Starting from positives, your descriptions are crisp and clear, and your dialogue does a good job of showing off your characters' personalities. That said, could you use ...

Happy Review Day! This was a pleasure to read. Your words have a way of capturing a magical setting. Keep in mind, though, elaboration is always helpful in setting description. ...

Happy Review Day! So I guess that this guy is waiting...and stalling. *dodges brick thrown at head* The way you opened up with a song was lovely, really. Although, you ...

Happy Review Day! To begin, let's go over some fundamentals. Your dialogue is nice and realistic, and your descriptions are quite pleasant. Still, the short story feels a little too ...

Desperate times, desperate measures. *takes deep breath* Hello, happy Review Day. Allow me to critique your work. First off, I'd like to address run-on sentences. They're tricky little suckers, sure. ...

Happy Review Day! To begin, this is a wonderful piece. The way you seamlessly include little details or mental comments to strengthen the scenario is wonderful. As for what's wrong ...

Happy Review Day! Let's begin positive. I love the feeling I get from all the animals. Some kind, some shrewd, some leaders. The words you use radiate with undisguised love ...