BondGirl007

Hey Lyn! I liked how the poem started out, I thought it was really cute. I didn't really like how you kept repeating "I promise" though. The whole thing is ...

Hey Timmy, I think this is pretty darn good for rhyming poetry, you should try free form, I'll bet you'd be great. The rhymes seem a bit forced, but I ...

Hey Kylan, So like Jack said it is very elongated, and you do take a while to get to your point. It feels a little tedious at times, which makes ...

Hey Lydia! So you've got a really cool way of rhyming, which I really like, it doesn't sound too forced which is a common problem when you try to rhyme ...

Okay so the beginning I found was kind of boring, which is not a good thing. The beginning is one of the most important parts, it's what draws your reader ...

Hey Emmy! The things you need to work on are using poetic imagery, and giving us the readers more information. You're very vague, and we as the reader want to ...

Hey Litehawk! So I don't really think this sounds like Narrative poetry, because it doesn't really tell much of a story, but never the less I enjoyed it. The only ...

Hi Emmy! So first off, I didn't like the italics in here, as Amy said let the words emphasize themselves. I'm guessing this like a message to yourself when you ...

Hey Ky! This poem actually reminded me a lot of something from Lord of the Rings, which is really cool. You've got a pretty good way of rhyming, but like ...

Hey Live, so I agree with Matt, you have a nice beginning and end, but the middle gets kind of long. I really love the beginning of this, most people ...

Yay! I really like this Jon, I think it's great! :) Your rhymes don't feel forced, and you've got the poetic examples that tend to be missing in a lot ...

Okay, well I'm not going to say I loved it, but it's not all that bad. I'm not so fond on the subject of "Oh he/she peers deep into my ...

Hey Ben, quick tip. While I was reading this, I noticed you used the word "Sense" or various forms of the word. That kind of threw me off the poem, ...

Okay so the biggest problem I had with this story was the way she talked about herself. Her "sparkling blue eyes" and "Petite lips" etc, and since you're telling it ...

Hey Shelby! First, I don't think it really needs to be rated 16+ because it wasn't all that gorey, but that's just my opinion. So anyway, what I think you ...