race to nowhere

Hi, Eucalyptusjoos here. I haven't read your poem before so I was intrigued to see what your style would be. Let's get to it!

"They say that Life is a race

‎The track looks different to everyone

‎Sometimes it's under the pool or in the air

‎Sometimes it isn't even there"

Very nice introduction, the mild rhyming ties it all together well. I get that for many people, they can try all they want but they won't even be allowed to compete, not even have a chance to prove themselves.
Hard work isn't the only thing setting you apart, its also the luck you were born with.

"Life is a race

‎But some of us are just floating or drowning"
Many have the privilege of competing for the big prize, but many are only trying to survive the coming day.

"If life is a race

‎Where are the doctors

‎Where are the people cheering

‎Because it is hurting "
In a race, you have people to help you up. You have the choice to quite. You have people who actually want you to win. but the game of life is cruel. No one will pick you and dust you off or fix you together if you fall and break yourself. No one wants you to win.

"Because it is hurting

‎And although I have it better than other people

‎I can't keep up

‎They have already gone too far

‎And it seems like I had barely made a move "
The narrator realizes a certain hopelessness, this lack of meaning for this rat race that only brings in people with promises but leaves them with broken hearts and broken limbs. You lack for nothing, but there are always bigger fish in the sea. It is a hopeless, scant endeavor. Your blood, sweat and tears do not deserve to be shed over this.

"And yet I am going because everyone is

‎But what's at the end of this track?

‎Death?

‎Why?"

Why do I have to suffer for no reason? If I do not profit, why does that still cost?

"Why can't I just sit here and observe what's outside the tracks?

‎Why does doing that kill us

‎Or make us indigent?"
OOh this is my favourite part. You are always dragged in, no matter what. You cannot choose to stand out, to not partake.

"Right now, life seems not like a race

‎But like chess

‎Where I am already at checkmate

‎And I

‎Just

‎Stop "

Death is the only release, very apt.

All in all, I love this poem a lot. Will definitely check out your other works <3333

hello there! majuli here to review your simple yet drawing poem.

i think you have touched on a topic that many of us face in life - falling behind and not knowing what our path in life is. it is very evident from your writing that you have grasped this particular emotion of wanting to be better and yet accepting failure.

my favourite lines are -

"The track looks different to everyone
Sometimes it's under the pool or in the air"

its speaks so beautifully and it sounds graceful and effortless. under the pool reminds me of a swimmer and in the air reminds me of pilots.

also the line - "Why can't I just sit here and observe what's outside the tracks?"

beautiful wording. it makes me sad just reading it.

thank you for sharing your work with us. it is beautiful.

keep writing!!

This is so true!
I think a lot of people can relate to this, and your writing is great!!!