You know, I just published a poem with almost the same name? They're kind of about the same thing, too... Illuminati confirmed!
sometimes
i just
lay here
in my bed
thinking of
what to do
there's a
whole day ahead
sometimes
i just
lay here
in the grass
staring at the sky
the clouds
there's a
whole world to cover
sometimes
i just
lay here
on the floor
thinking of
what i've done
there's nothing
left to destroy
sometimes
i just
stay here
alone
crying
i don't know why
maybe there's
whole worlds to cover
with my tears.
You know, I just published a poem with almost the same name? They're kind of about the same thing, too... Illuminati confirmed!
Wow, this was amazing. I loved it. I don't have time to do a review but I just wanted to let you know this is lovely.
Heyo racket, Flite here for a review. It has been a pretty long time since I've reviewed any poetry, I don't know how useful this review will be but here I go. The intention of this poem is not bad, I can see the seed of an idea in here. But the poem itself is disconnected, partially due to the way you've formatted it.
The breaks here feel like they're decorations rather than actual breaks for rhythm. The poem reads choppy and clunky and I have to stop every now and again to go back and read the previous line to remind myself what exactly it is you're talking about.
Let's talk about the content of your poem a bit. In all honesty, I see this as more of a stream-of-consciousness in which you talk about thoughts instead of well, poetry. The poem itself is very literal, concrete and there is nothing wrong with that. However, often, you don't finish these thoughts. And we're left with half of a whole, a seedling that has yet to be flowered.
sometimes
i just
lay here
in my bed
thinking of
what to do
there's a
whole day ahead
Andddd, that about sums up my life , we done here ?
Seriously , message me at 1 pm ask me what I'm doing . Laying in bed . It's 2 am right now , laying in bed .
Anyways , this was a really good and free flowing poem . I could relate to it and see the person and their feelings and I love how you repeated the thing about the world ... Nice touch . I'm sorry that this review is so short , how does one critique something so honestly true and raw ? Exactly .
Keep it up
~Kat
This expresses the entire feeling of hopelessness. It is the feeling that there is nothing in this world that can possibly bring you joy or that will possibly bring you out of a very unpleasant circumstance. I like the way that you separated the phrases with periods. It makes it look neater and in a way it creates some sort of emphasis. It is really creative, but I hope that you feel better. Continue to write and express your feelings with words. It is a beautiful art.
------> Merrysleuth
Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope through the power of the Holy Ghost. Romans 15:13
Written in the style of a stream of consciousness, this poem perfectly depicts the state of a hazy mind and disruptions faced in thought during raw exposure to life's various stages.
Starting off with several lines, slowly diminishing into broken statements, the poem elaborates the state of one who begins the process of thought with a steady mind, and slowly drifts away into distractions or disruptions from surroundings or from within, as seen constantly throughout all verses, starting from:
"sometimes
i just
lay here
in my bed
.
thinking of
what to do
.
there's a
whole day ahead"
The lack of punctuation depicts the level of informality, as well as the lack of organisation that the brain provides when one is drafting away thoughts.
Moreover, the transition from "bed" to "grass" to "floor" depicts various stages of the day; the latter itself may be a metaphor of various stages in life that render one full of thoughts, yet utterly 'speechless' in thoughts themselves.
Furthermore, the final verses seal the essence of the poem, capturing the essence of the loneliness sketched throughout the poem, the sadness finally surfacing in the act of 'crying,' which is also the predominant element throughout the writing as is finalised by the statement:
"maybe there's
whole worlds to cover
.
with my tears."
This sums up the very feeling of the poem, concisely framing it within one bundle, declaring outright the subtle hints of sadness and innate suffering implied throughout the 'days' (spent in grass) and 'nights' (in bed) spent speculating upon the suppressed feeling of pain that has a cause yet to be unearthed.
Hi Racket!
CatLover211 here to review your work! But don't worry, I like it a lot. Hardly anything bad.
Instead of complaining, I have one question.
1.) The way you chose to put a lowercase i- is that intentional? Because if it is, then I don't have a problem with that. Some poets are all about grammar and punctuation and capitalization and more, but I'm okay with various types here.
I can see how this poem could express depression. Migraines as well in a way. I like how you begin some of the stanzas the same way as your title is.
"sometimes
i just
stay here
alone
*
crying
i don't know why"
That says a lot. You don't always have a reason for crying- it could be from many or something could be so personal you couldn't say it out loud. It seems as if you're depressed and in pain during this poem- I hope not in real life!
You've done a wonderful job on this poem, which portrays many feelings that surface from a reader. I really liked reading it! Your tone and mood was excellent all throughout the writing. Congratulations! A satisfied reader/poet! 
Feel free to check out my work under my author name CatLover211!
Happy writing! And I hope you cheer up!
Yo, formatting tip. In the publisher, press "shift" along with "enter" when making a new line, and that way it won't be so spaced out. Also, you won't need the periods to separate the stanzas.
120,199 Literary Works • 649,045 Reviews
Points: 575
Reviews: 193
Donate