Don’t ask for a favour
Don’t ask for a hand
I won’t catch you when you fall
Won’t help you up when you land
Forget all the nice things
I’ve ever done
Forget every fight for you
I’ve ever won
Think of the bad things
I’m gonna say
I want you to hate me
It’s better off this way
Don’t ask for a good word
Don’t ask for a lend
I’m not a good person
I’m not a good friend
Forget every secret
We’ve ever shared
Forget how I held you
When you were scared
Think of the mean things
I did every day
I want you to hate
It’s better off this way
Don’t ask for a lifeline
Don’t ask for my love
I’m always giving
But it’s never enough
Think of the great things
I never do
Forget all the good times
We ever went through
Think how I’m horrible
And the games that I play
I want you to hate me
It’s better off this way
Don’t ask me to wait for you
Don’t ask me to help
I’ll only wreck everything
I only care for myself
Think of the chaos
I always cause
Think how I take it all
And always want more
Forget all you remember
About yesterday
I want you to hate me’
It’s better off this way
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~Words can be so powerful if you chose to use them right~
Firstly, is this a poem or lyrics? It doesn't show typical song stuff (chorus, bridge, verse, etc.) besides having verses.
Other than that, it keeps a consistent rhyme scheme, although as said above, some of the rhymes sound forced to be there just so you can have it rhyme with something later. For example "Don't ask for a lend". It's a little awkward sounding. And in the fourth stanza the cause/more rhyme doesn't exactly flow. Also sometimes the rhythm goes bad in places because the length of your lines differ. Even a little is a lot. I suggest reading through again and saying it out loud. Especially if they are lyrics, you'll want to hear how it sounds.
Nice concept though, and if it ends up as a song, it has a very pop ballad sort of vibe. Or it could go country in a Taylor Swift way.
i agree i really like this poem i CAN relate which is mainly why i like it and i think many people will be able to....
I REALLY like this poem, especially because I can relate to it so well, and I feel like a lot of people will be able to. There were some parts where the rhyming was a little forced, and sometimes the rhythm was lost, but only for a few seconds. Otherwise it was a fantastic poem, and you have a lot of talent!