The Risen - chapter seven

Sebastian

I pressed heavy with my pencil on the charcoal paper, thickening the shadows on her neck. I don’t know how I came up with the features of her face, nor could I really see her in my mind, but no matter what I did, it was always the same girl. The only thing that frequently changed were her expressions. Sometimes they were joyous, other times fearful, other times empty.

I had gone through hundreds of papers. Some people might think it’s a tad bit obsessive, but even when I have the intention of sketching someone different, she always comes back, almost like she was haunting me. I think part of the reason I can’t seem to stop drawing her is that I don’t think about what I’m actually drawing while I draw, I use the time to let my mind wander.

I had decided a long time ago to stop fighting it. These days I don’t even try to understand it anymore. I just use it as my tool to escape. Just like how Indie hikes, or Kaydence mothers, or Xander shoots. We’re all just trying to find any way necessary to not think about the bigger picture. It’s not that I necessarily don’t enjoy killing bastard demons, but deep down anyone and everyone wants to find peace. But I think that’s what scares me the most, the unknown to come after this.

A faint tap interrupting my thoughts. I looked up and surprisingly saw Kaydence standing by the doorway, arms crossed. She was looking at the ground, avoiding eye contact with me, probably because of her little explosion from earlier.

"Uh, yes?" I said, quickly putting away the piece I had been working on.

"We don't have any food left for dinner," she opened her mouth as if she was going to add on, but closed it after. I studied her for a second, taking in her messy hair and puffy eyes. She looked like she had been crying. Had I done that?

The corners of my lips curved up, only for a split second, as I got up. "Call everyone outside, we'll take care of that problem right away." I started towards her, sliding on my shoes.

It was only then that she looked up, "How? Do we need everyone to go to the store? That would probably look a little suspicious." She shifted her weight uncomfortably, standing up straighter.

"I mean out back, and trust me, I have a plan." I walked past her, noticing her confused face, but she followed behind me anyways. I turned to the closet as she went on down the hall, knocking on doors and telling them to come out.

I grabbed a gun, loading it. Kaydence shot me glance when she heard the noise, frowning. "And what do you plan on using that for?" she questioned.

"You'll see," I shot her a smile. She rolled her eyes and followed me outside. One by one, each of my family members stepped outside, watching me with cautious eyes.

Last, was Archie, "Ah, Archie. Just the man I wanted to see! I decided that since you love to steal and play with guns so much, you could help us with dinner!" I said in an overly-cheery tone.

Archie stood frozen. The terror in his eyes only fed the sensation of power in my veins and I motioned him to grab the rifle in my hand. He swallowed, stepping forward with a shaking hand, and slowly grabbed the gun from my hand.

My cheery act dropped as the weight of the gun left my hand, I wanted him to know I was serious. “Follow me,” I barked, leading the way into the woods. We continued silently for a few moments until a faint rustle in the bushes surrounding us caught my attention.

We came to a halt and I turned towards the worried faces behind me. I pressed my index finger to my lips, indicating them to be quiet. Ahead, a rabbit had settled down to gnaw away on some bark.

I pulled Archie in front of me, pointing towards where the rabbit was resting, still unbothered by us. “Shoot it,” I said quietly into his ear.

“What? Why? No! I won’t do it, that’s ridiculous!” he said incredulously.

“This is your punishment for stealing what’s not yours. Maybe after this, you’ll get it through your head the power you’re playing with,” I sneered. “Shoot it.”

Archie hesitated, pleading at me with desperate eyes to change my mind.

“Raise your gun, and shoot, dammit!” I spit, growing impatient.

Archie was shaking under my glare, and tears gathered in his eyes. He whimpered, slowly pointing his gun at the oblivious rabbit.

“What? Are you insane Sebastian? He’s just a kid!” Indie yelled in disbelief.

I snapped my head around to her, “He needs to understand the consequences of life and death. You’d think he would know by now considering what we do, but what if an innocent had been wandering around in these woods while he was carelessly waving a gun he doesn’t know how to use around? You didn't think about that did you? Maybe I should teach you all a lesson,” the words dripped like venom from my lips.

“Kaydence, please, make him see reason!” she exclaimed, pleading.

My eyes shot to Kaydence, who was looking between me and Archie, biting her lip before finally settling on me. I raised an eyebrow, challenging her to respond.

“You won’t do it. You wouldn’t…” she said, studying me.

“Fine.” I grabbed the pistol from the back of my jeans and pointed it towards the bunny. The sound echoed throughout the woods, and the rifle slipped out of Archie’s hands. I looked over to see him squeezing his eyes shirt, tears staining his face.

There was a moment of ringing silence and no one moved. Indie rushed to Archie, grabbing him and leading him away. Everyone but Kaydence, who was staring at the lifeless rabbit, followed after them.

“You,” she started walking towards me, stopping a step away from me, “You are the most disgusting and vile person I think I have ever met, and you will always be alone because no one could ever possibly love a twisted beast like you.”

My smirk dropped, turning into a frown. She held my gaze for a couple more seconds before turning and leaving the same way as the others had. I looked over at where the rabbit had bled to its death and felt nothing. Why did I feel nothing?

I knew it wasn’t the right way to feel. I knew I should’ve felt sympathy for it, but I just felt power. Nothing was more of a drug to me than this feeling. I would do anything, chasing this high. Even if that meant hurting my own family members in the process.

My fists clenched, and I started shaking, my vision getting red. Without thinking, I swung at the trunk of the tree closest to me, and feeling no pain, I continued until both my knuckles were bleeding. I stood there, huffing, and staring where my blood stained the bark.

“Shit.” Shooting pain radiates through my whole hand, and I tried opening and closing them, only to immediately regret it. At least I felt something. I felt cold prickles of raindrops on the back of my neck, and I searched the forming clouds in the sky.

You will always be alone. For the first time since we had been back on Earth, I truly felt the emptiness of this existence. I was alone. And what's worse, I pushed the only people I had to be here with me through this.

I trudged through the now downpour, feeling something other than the hunger for power for what seemed like the first time. I felt misery. She was right, I would never be loved by anyone. I would always be alone because of my hunger for power.

I felt loopy with sadness, everything around me was black around the edges. I could hear humming in the distance. Everything was white in front of me, and I saw the back of Kaydence’s head, her long brown hair blowing in the wind.

“Kaydence?” She looked like a dream, dressed in white, it was almost angelic. She looked back at me with loving eyes and a small smile spread against her lips. We were closer now, and she reached out, grabbing my hand. It tingled where she touched, like magic. I looked down at our hands intertwined, and it felt good.

She took her other hand under my chin, bringing my gaze back to her, and slowly leaned closer to me. My breath caught, anticipating what would come next. I couldn’t think. It felt like everything was happening so fast and all at once, but at the moment it was slow motion.

I was hungry for her, I could hardly stand the few seconds it took for her lips to touch mine. I felt myself falling backward, everything becoming more and more fuzzy. All I could focus on was her lips, soft and intentional with its movement until it disappeared altogether and everything was black.

Until I saw her. 

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chapter word count: 1,537

total word count: 13,538