*This story is underneath my folder titled “Zeze and Zuzu the clowns”. Gacha Club character designs are under my forum titled “My character designs<33”. Enjoy!*
Andrea sat alone at the lunch table, chewing on her turkey sandwich. It was her first day in kindergarten. She watched the other kids talk. It seemed as though they already had friends and she didn’t have anyone.
“Hey!” A girl said behind her.
Andrea turned around, to face the girl.
“What’s your name?” The girl asked.
“A-Andrea.”
What did she want? Why was she talking to her?
The girl smiled, her blue eyes seeming brighter at the action.
“I’m Alessia. Can I sit with you?”
“Sure!” Andrea said happily.
Could it be that she was making a friend? That she wouldn’t be lonely? It appeared so.
Andrea’s body filled with warmth. Having a friend would be nice.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,024 Literary Works • 672,762 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Kate and I'm here to leave a quick review!!
First Impression
Well looks like I've stumbled on another one of those rare works that you tend to find that are just purely wholesome. Not every day that you tend to find something like that and I think this was an especially relatable one, being new in school and having someone that reaches out and helps you out.
Anyway let's get right to: Kate's Line by Line Reactions;
Well this is quite the start here. Looks like Andrea is having a bit of a tough time fitting in being the newest person in the school amongst people who all seem to know each other pretty well from the looks of it. Makes for quite the exciting start here. We'll see where this goes.
Well this is quite the nice ending here. Looks like in the end Andrea finds someone after all, and of course things are going to get much better there to start with. Knowing this world, their story might not exactly end terribly well, but its a nice moment regardless.
Aaand that's it for this oneee!!!
Overall
Overall I think you've done a wonderful job putting that together there. A soft little moment amidst some chaos and what looks to be a gentle moment of happiness. Until next time
As always remember to: Take what you think was helpful and forget the rest!
Kate
Hey, Kaerae here!
Aw, I like this short little excerpt. It is so easy to be lonely sometimes, but yet you reminded me here of how easy it is to make a friend when we were younger. Now, as a half adult (haha) it is very hard. I don't socialize as much anymore and when I see someone sitting by themself, I kinda assume they want to be left alone.
I think most people have been in that situation, feeling out of place. But I think as kids it is easier to go up to people and just chat. I suppose that is how a friendship starts.
I like the little stutter you added to her line. It seems fair to assume that she is a little nervous. And I especially love the last little bit
The little energy that seemed to radiate off her even if she just said her name and that she could sit. I haven't read the story so I am not sure how their friendship grows, but I like the little flashback? you added here for context~
Keep writing,
Kaerae
It's great!!
It's great