*This story is underneath my folder titled “Clowns, magic, murder, and lies”. Gacha Club character designs are under my forum titled “My character designs<33[2]”. Enjoy!*
From the corner of Penelope’s room, a pink orb shone.
The pink orb formed and materialized into…into…
Into Nova.
Nova gave her a lipsticked grin, eyes twinkling brightly.
“I visited Dad today.”
“You…you did?”
“I did. He misses you, Mom. He wants to see you again.”
“Did he tell you why we broke up?” Penelope asked, for if Nova knew the whole truth, then she wouldn’t have come to Penelope at the moment.
Nova nodded, her eyes sprinkled with sadness.
“Then you know that it’s for the best. I was only hurting him in the end. You wielded your powers better than me, but something bad still would have been bound to happen, there’s always an inevitable slip-up and-“
“But I never got a chance to really use my powers. You still do. You have to have faith in yourself, Mom.”
So Nova had John’s same optimism?
It charmed and hurt Penelope’s heart at the same time.
“Ever since Dad left…you seemed a little sad. So did Dad. I don’t like seeing you two upset. Would you at least talk to him, for me?” Nova asked.
Her eyes were so full of innocence and love, so kind, so true…
“I’ll talk to him. If it works out, it works out. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. But I’ll talk to him.” Penelope said.
That, she would promise.
“Thank you.” Nova said softly.
Nova formed and disappeared into a soft pink orb. Then, the orb itself faded away.
Penelope’s eyes brimmed with tears. She missed John and she missed Nova, but one of them was still alive, still waiting.
Penelope would have to try.
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139,274 Literary Works • 672,523 Reviews
Back for one more review before I pass out! Penelope is a familiar name, but I cant recall at the time which story I read with her.
Ahahaha I'm sorry this made me laugh so much because the gif of Leanardo Dicaprio going "you will?" from Django Unchained flashed across my eyes.
Better than I, I do believe. Penelope strikes me as someone who would speak with prim and proper English.
I'm not sure if it just doesn't sit right with my brain, or if it's actually grammatically incorrect, but "never got" and "you still do" clashes. I think if it was never had or was never able to...you still can, either of those feel right to me more than what the original says.
Is there a reason why these are both in their own quotations and on separate lines despite both being said by Nova with nothing in between?
I think for how little is said and described, you can really feel the atmosphere. Both the pleading and wishful thinking of Nora, and the combatting cynicism of Penelope that feels like it's covering up a glimmer of hope that she still has. Like she wants Nora to be right, but if she isn't she might not recover from it this time. Classic daughter-mother dynamic. I liked it.
~Messy
I thought it would look better to space it, but I might edit it. Also, Nova is dead and Penelope is not, that is why Nova words it like that.
Glad you enjoyed!
Hi there, vampricone! Dropping by to give you a review on this latest piece, as promised. I will be using the YWS'mores method to help structure my review.
The Top Graham Cracker: Okay, so! Last installement, we left off with John still in a hospital bed, recovering from his injuries and being visited by the spirit of his deceased sister, Bellona. Now, I see from a quick glance we get to see things from Penelope's POV, so! Let's jump right in.
The Slightly Burnt Marshmallow: Not sure if it's intentional, but I noticed that Nova's dialogue went from being italicized, to not being italicized, to being italicized again. Is that intentional? Usually, when dialogue is entirely in italics, it's to symbolize dialogue that is internal, such as reading mental thoughts or communicating nonverbally. So this could be what you were doing with Nova, but if it wasn't, maybe just check on it? Other than that, I saw nothing else to critique.
The Melty Chocolate Bar Ohhh please, my heart! Poor Penelope. I just wanna give her a hug and shake her for being so silly. I know she's afraid of hurting John and I know she feels guilty beyond belief, but I also know that she loves John desperately, and I want her to go be with him, because he loves her desperately as well. These two were made for each other.
I also love how it was Nova who went to John in the form of Bellona! What a fun little surprise. I love how hard she's trying to get her family together. Judging from the context, it seems she passed away as well? God, my heart... these two have suffered so much... I really hope they can overcome all of this grief and pain and find happiness together. I hope Penelope realizes that she can control her powers, and I hope that these two are able to reconcile soon. They clearly need each other!
My favorite lines were these:
The Bottom Graham Cracker: Overall, this was a really good update to the story. I love the raw emotion that we see here with Penelope and how vulnerable she is being to her daughter. I love that Nova wants to help so very badly. Here's hoping the next chapter has good news! *fingers crossed*
I hope this review was a bit helpful.
~Iggy
Yes, thank you for reading! As for not italicizing Nova%u2019s words at one point%u2026that was a mistake. Thanks for pointing that out. I%u2019ll edit it!