The Scariest Things

Teddybear22 wrote:I never want to lose you,
But I know I will one day
Sometimes the scariest things are true.

I hope the skies will always be blue,
But they always turn gray
I never want to lose you.

I have some good news and bad news. The good news is that your first stanza was pretty good because it was so simplistic that I imagined it delving deep later on, much like a boulder rolling off of a hill and swirling faster and faster amid the grains of sky as it does. But...this didn't come true for your second stanza was just as juvenile. Either add much poetic weight to the following stanzas or rework your first and second stanza; otherwise, it seems to drag on in childhood verses and vapid analogies.

Whenever I do not think things through,
Shadows may come my way.
Sometimes the scariest things are true.

Things always come in pairs of two.
Without you I never will be gay,
I never want to lose you.

Here, you are trying too hard to rhyme and because of that, your rhymed words again don't seem to have any purpose but...to rhyme, which is circular reasoning. Also, the imagery is severely lacking here and you're telling us rather than showing. "Whenever I do not think things through, shadows may come my way" is a prime example of this.

I hate darkness and everything about it too,
Though sometimes it is only play.
Sometimes the scariest things are true.

I did not really understand this. You hate darkness but you play with it? Are you trying to say that you see death as a game, and thus an extension of, life?

Things will never become new.
Just like I want you to stay,
I never want to lose you,
Sometimes the scariest things are true.

Decent ending, I don't have much to say besides use more visual imagery and metaphor. That goes for the whole poem, by the way; right now, it's very dry. I like the idea, though.