Expectations drive you mad
Either you expect the best
And get the worst.
Or expect the worst and get the best.
Both switch the boards, makes you confused,
and before you can start,
You’ve got ten different pieces all locked up.
My expectations are falling apart.
Half fight for the worst
Half fight for the best.
Whichever side, they both die
And I get the grand old feeling of surprise.
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138,206 Literary Works • 672,082 Reviews
I really liked this. I may not have interpreted it correctly but I feel like don't expect much. I should know better then to expect from others even my own family. anyway good write.
I like it. It's really deep. I like the last line the best, "And I get the grand old feeling of surprise." It's like you did all this expecting so you wouldn't be surprised, but you're surprised anyways! I like it. I don't really have any real critiques it's so good. Sorry!
-tgirly
I really like it. I don't always read about this and it is very easy to relate to. Lovely poem! Keep up the good work!
Really well written, although there are a few small things I'm a little confusing. Overall, my main concern is that I didn't exactly get the full concept; I got like, the first 5 lines, but the part about 10 pieces seriously threw me off. I wasn't aware of how it really relates to the number 10, the worst or best and best and worst. However I remained confused until probably the last line, which I thought was awesome!
It just has something about it that shows your frustration and everything, while not making you sound like a little bratty 2 year old. Also, perhaps the beginning could have a little more detailed word choice, or perhaps been double spaced or something? It seems almost a bit cluttered to me, like it was all being crammed into a little bubble that just might pop if you fill it up to full! Also, divide up some of those lines!
This whole section is a little off-beat, if you know what I mean. In the first part, "Either you expect the best" and "And get the worst" are separated into two lines, while then the rhythm is knocked by "Or expect the worst and get the best" crashing into the nice little flow we had going. The two parts should reflect each other, as when they're different, it could add to the confused. Switching the boards was clever, although "makes you confused" could have been a little bit less obvious, or perhaps the wording could be tweaked to make it a bit more poetic? Makes you confused should also have been it's own line, I think. Even something as simple as "Making you confused" or if you want to go a bit deeper, something like "twisting your mind"(I know that stinks, just an example of an attempt.)
What are we starting? I was pretty foggy there, and then, you twisted my mind.
I don't know what pieces we're talking about here, although the rest makes sense to me and I start loving it at the following line. May I say, the "half fight" part I found pretty brilliant.
Overall, I'd say this has extreme potential, and could turn out to be one INCREDIBLE poem, and right now it's already fabulous! Keep on writing!