z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

You and I

by KittyMew


Who are we?

What are we?



I am the same as you

We encounter things

That none of us could understand



People would look down on us

They see us “unusual”

Others would call us “special”



We run and hide

So no one would question

“Who we really are”



There are people like us

They run away

They hide themselves

It's unnatural for them to stay



Confusion,

Isolation,



They tell us something



Happiness,

Sadness,

Pain,



The mixed feelings they have

Do you have them?



Danger are onto us

Strangers keeping us in their base

Testing us with their trials



We use our ability

To avoid them

There are others cannot



Help,

Protection,

Safety,



We do these for our love ones

Our friends and family

Who are close to us



The day I remember

You lost someone dear to you

I helped you stood up



The day I lost

And another one

Was trying to protect me



We both lost

A friend who hid his identity

For so long



Someone was crying

Blood and tears were mixed

On my skin

I sense of tragedy

While calling that person's name



Agony,

Hate,

Revenge,



Feelings that came from our leader

A friend who lost a friend

A person who was like his brother



But you knew

That was a sign

To us all



To protect one another

You have to steal

The powers from our kind



Anxiety,

Loneliness,



Before you left

You promise

That you would return



Scared,

Believe,



A year has passed

You were in your bed

Watching outside with a smile



But when you looked at me

Giving me that strange look

I realize, you don't remember me



“That’s okay, you don’t have to.”

Relieve and happiness

Are the only feelings that I have.




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60 Reviews


Points: 34
Reviews: 60

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Tue May 31, 2016 7:55 am
AllisonArgent wrote a review...



Hi there. I'm reading your poem and giving you a review at the same time. so far so good. I think you mean 'We do these for our loved one' you wrote 'love'. I just love how you put words like agony,hate.etc after two or three stanzas it build's the poem with true feelings. I think you meant relief and happiness at last. Well I've never heard of the anime but I think I have got a good idea of the anime by reading your poem rather than the mistakes I just pointed out to you there I loved you poem and it's build's a very good story that keeps us reading. Is that blonde girl Chaorlette? or what was her right spelling well anyway keep up the good work well I think I have not offended you my miss spelling that girl's name.




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184 Reviews


Points: 36
Reviews: 184

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Sat May 28, 2016 3:57 pm
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RoyalHighness wrote a review...



Royal here for a review!
I've never seen this anime, so I'll just stick to comments about the technical aspect of the poem.
I think the line "Who we really are" doesn't need quotations, even if it's a quote from the anime. I think it'd be more effective without it.
You don't need to capitalize and punctuate every line. I think if you left the commas out of the stanzas that are just two or three words, it'd be way more effective.
Halfway through, it seemed like the speaker started talking about something totally different. I felt like I was reading two completely different poems. So if you cut this in half and made a separate poem out of the last half, both poems would have more of an impact on the reader.
I think you could generalize this in a way that would be more relatable to people who haven't seen the anime. I think if you talked more generally about the concepts of love and loss, and then applied those concepts to a single scene from the anime, rather than the entire anime, the poem would be both more relatable to a larger audience, and still retain its meaning to the people who have seen the anime.

Personally, I wasn't a huge fan of this poem (mostly because I haven't seen the anime, so it's possible my thoughts are totally invalid). I'm more of a metaphor kinda girl, rather than explicit statements like "anger," "believe," etc. But that's just my opinion, and since I haven't seen the anime, I'm sure the fans of it would love this homage to the characters. Good job!




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485 Reviews


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Reviews: 485

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Sat May 28, 2016 1:10 pm
Elijah wrote a review...



Hello there.
I can say that I really understand this work fully because of my lack of knowledge about this anime but I had heard a lot about it and I felt the feels enough without even watching it. Well, I did not watch it because all of the comments about it and news when it came out actually even if it now that new anymore.
From what I understood of this work, and what I personally know about this anime ( if I can say I know at least a bit, hehe ), it is about people different from the other and they are a total different kind. Each with a very specific and different from the next one power that they decide what to do with, bad or good, use it or not. This work is really sweet but at the same times heartbreaking but of the very end of it.
When someone you really care about does not remember you at all..well, if this is not heartbreaking and a feeling that can actually ruin you, what else it is?
I have no complains because you have good vocabulary and right punctuation, and grammar.
I am surprised how a good poem a memory for one anime can be. Very good job and hope to see more of you sooner or later.
From all these feels, surely I will not be able to watch the anime in the end. XD





Have you met a cow or another large animal?
— Liminality