Rebirth

Timmy here to give you a review!!

This was a beautiful poem! It sounds almost like a flower... an annual flower. Dying in the winter, and resurrecting in the spring. I have daffodils all around my house that do that very thing, so that was a brilliant part of this poem!!

I love how everything ties together so well, how everything relates to being born again, and yet it all centers on nature as your example of that. Simple amazing!

You are going to have to forgive me now, cuz I am going to critique you like usual!

filled with new beginnings and
infinite skylines. ---Those two lines, no matter how flowing, don't match up with the rest, and if read out, seem to make it like its one line.

refreshed the dust of nothingness
they once were. ---Another line where you make it seem like the second is just an extension of the first. That, and the second line seems to short compared to all of the other lines in this poem.

In the midst of winter, I found within me, ----That line doesn't flow like the rest of them. I think its the commas

Timmy was here and shall review later!!

Very beautiful.

Your descriptions really transport me to this place and time, and I suddenly find myself wishing I would keel over so I could be resurrected like this.

"Revived by the cool breeze,
filled with new beginnings and
infinite skylines.
Awoken by flower petals,
gracefully dancing on my skin."

These lines really speak to me. There's nothing better than the calm wind on your face during a warm, sunny day to make the world fresh and bright. You mention of flower petals here really gives it that last touch that speaks of the beauty and wonder of spring.

I once read a similar poem that was written about Jesus Christ's Resurrection. I doubt you were thinking about this, but it gives me the same sorts of thoughts and feelings, and I like it all the more because of that.

Very good work.

Thank you InfinityandBeyond!

Hello! This poem is, sorry to sound cliche, but a breath of fresh air! So many poems have been written about Spring but I still feel like yours is fresh. "The presence of spring in my bones, refreshed the dust of nothingness they once were" reads a little bit strangely. I'm not sure how to change it because I'm not exactly sure what you were trying to say. I loved the repetition of the first line at the end. Great job.

Hey! I really did enjoy reading this poem, I love the idea of it and the start and end lines were really well done and used.
It made me question the person's past, but that is not a criticism, it's probably not relevant too...

I don't have much to comment on in terms of criticisms, since I can see most of the previous reviews have already covered things. So I will just wrap up by saying good work and I will certainly be reading more of your stuff in the future

Hi there! I'm here to fictitiously review, so ignore everything I say...

Criticism

What I noticed about this poem was that you overuse the word "the" in a lot of places. You might want to vary this, as it'll make it seem more lyrical/flowing/etc. as opposed to being a bit forced. I hope that makes sense.
~
Also:

"In the midst of winter, I found within me,
was an invincible spring."

This is grammatically incorrect. Here's an example of how to revise it:

"In the midst of winter, I found within me
a purely invincible spring."
~
You don't need a comma after "song":

"The bird singing to nature's love song,
restored the rhythm back into my heart."

Why I Love This Poem

The flow is marvelous - it's hard to make words roll off the tongue in a free-verse that has varied syllable-numbers per line, but you did that. It reads aloud beautifully, and the message is empowering and oddly tranquil - well, maybe not so oddly. Makes me think of the future for some reason. Well done.

This is a beautiful poem.

"The bird singing to nature's love song,
restored the rhythm back into my heart."

Yep, your poem too keeps a steady rhythm.
I love your descriptions, i love the soft words:

Awoken by the flower petals,
gracefully dancing on my skin.

But, there are grammatical errors that kind of ruin it.
"I died in the winter
and resurrected in spring."

It should be "... and was resurrected in spring"

"The presence of spring in my bones,
refreshed the dust of nothingness
they once were. "
I couldn't understand what you mean by "they once were".

Overall it's a good poem but take care of the grammar, it's important