A Piece of My Mind

Here for a quick review.

The brain is a fascinating place, full of its countless mysteries. Since I love humorous poetry, I feel I can give you some advise here on improving it and tell you where you've excelled. Also, I will switch between a general, advisory tone and a more humorous tone, and I will use tone indicators /j for humorous and /gen for the general stuff. (/gen)

Let's get in to it! (/gen)

First of all, this poem seems to be something more than a simple humorous poem. (Puts tinfoil hat and English teacher getup on.) Perhaps, as evident by the "the let me sleep at night", the poem is actually just a poignant exploration of your insomnia. Or perhaps, you just published your first book and are overwhelmed by the response — Oh wait, that's me. (/j)

No, to be honest, you do a good job at generally putting pen to paper on what you're going through, and the emotional beats stick out, in a good way. I think, honestly, where I can tell you to improve would mostly be length. The fact that this is barely four quadri-verse stanzas is not ideal. This should be longer, and I think that will allow me to enjoy it more. (/gen)

Clever and using meta-references, you excel at creating a humorous concoction of trouble and timing! (/gen)

Now, please, somebody help me calm the sore thumb that's my brain. (/j)

Hello Horisun,

Thank you for the interesting poem. The brain has an incredible capacity. Especially having even named itself and since mine is directing me to say this. A set of working gears is good imagery, but my brain tells me it prefers a complex set of muscles. Don’t ask me why? The poem is very clever. Must be going crazy, because I swear I read another verse. Never mind that. Tell my brain to behave. Fantastic. (Fantastic place. Quiet brain!)

Good luck with your endeavours,
Francis

Hello, this poem is rather clever, not going to lie. I like how you are saying all the nice things you like about your brain, but by the end, you are just pleading to go to sleep. This is so relatable... When I read the last sentence it made me laugh. The flow and pace of your words are great too!

Hey hey! Notsi here,

I really enjoyed the rhyme scheme and the flow of words. Its short and simple yet there's thought within it. I must ask though: Why did you categorize the poem as humor?
I will also say that I feel as though we all think our brains can be sucky because sometimes we get stuck in it. Despite it, I enjoy the poem. I believe I will continue to look into your pieces.

Much love.

I loved reading this poem! I can relate,I do stay awake at night with ideas.But how can anyone not? The inspiration comes late at night,when no one else is around to bother you.Is it annoying? Yes,it can be,most of the time,but we’re all lucky to have our imaginations.Great poem! I enjoyed it! I hope you have a wonderful and awesome day and night!

Book_Dragon here for a super quick review.

I absolutely love this. And I definitely relate! (Honestly, could my brain just shut up for a few minutes so I can fall asleep. I'm running on two hours and it isn't healthy).

All in all, great poem! I don't have any suggestions or other comments. Excellent job, and keep writing!

-Me