Life Drawing: An Excuse to see Naked People

Life Drawing: An Excuse to see Naked People

By: Elizabeth Mathers

The class was anxious. Especially me.

I had been trained for nearly a semester, and the final grade all came down to this: drawing a nude figure. Although it might seem absurd and honestly bizarre this is the way that things are done here in my class. If you want to pass the worlds most peppiest art class in the state then this is the price you pay.

I never thought drawing innocent tulips and disfigured stick people would lead to this; a detailed picture of a woman's nakedness, just for a grade.

"If it's a girl watch Bobbie over here pop one, if it's a boy watch Bobbie pop a bigger one!" Matt twirled his brush around like a girlish baton. He was roaring with laughter, and his little group of friends began to nudge each another and laugh.

"Dude shut up!" Bobbie reached over and shoved Matt off the stool he was on top of. He fell to the ground with an ear satisfying thump! It was out of nervousness, I convinced myself, I'm nervous but they just have a very brute way of displaying it. . .

Ah, the lovely immaturity of life, it's so plentiful and annoying. I stared at their elementary-like movements before the head of the class; Miss Hashclipper (That's not as strange as our principal, Mr. Filesticker) announced the arrival of our final-mark model.

"She is from Sweden; my opinion, they have the most gorgeous bodies-"

"When they ain't fat!" The class was torn between laughter and confusion. Matt just didn't know when to stop.

"Mr. Justise! Take your seat or leave this class-" Matt got up, and with a wave, walked out of the classroom, "As I was saying, Swedish people have the most beautiful bodies, and my niece found me a model for you, willing and valiant enough to do this rather odd favor. Please welcome, Hielda Grassonpheil," Miss Hashclipper clapped as she stepped off the platform in the middle of the class, which was surrounded by easels and stools.

"Hallo, I em Hielda and I em vary heppy to be here," Hielda smiled at us and spoke with this thick accent. It was such a magnificent accent and I fell in love with it immediately.

Hielda was a towering lady with bleached blond hair, highlighted with a thin chestnut coat, a deep tan complexion and strong azure eyes stood in on the stage that was built in the middle of the room in a lavender robe. Our easels encircled her. She was so beautiful. I wished I could run my hand through her hair.

"Everybody, get to work, this is due at the end of class," Miss Hashclipper clapped her hands and we picked up our pastels, paints, and pencils. The rush of blood in my heart ran into my throat and I coughed to try and clear it up.

The robe she wore slid off her body and fell softly too the ground. She had a green towel wrapped around her hips. I heard groans from all over the room. Her slim figure, alone with that lovely tan colored skin was just what inspired me to title my picture "The Bronze Woman". As strange and Greek as it sounded, I settled with it.

The male students who were standing around me kept edging closer to her and I saw her eyes not even turn to face them. She stood tall and proud. I kept drawing; making sure every curve of her finely shaped body was as perfect as it could be.

Her breasts were the only things that I had difficulty finding a color for. The shape was nothing I couldn't have done, nice, rounded, like a circle made for gods. Although her entire body was bronzed, her breasts were a pale white, as if they had never seen the light of day before. I settled the dispute with myself and picked up a beige pastel to exaggerate them a bit and continued my work.

Her eyes were the second hardest to find a tint for. I wanted to settle with a teal mixed in with baby blue but that wouldn’t cut it for my grade and possibly the feud going on in my mind.

How the time flew. I was barely finished with the coloration of her the tip of the green towel before the teacher shouted out that class was dismissed. It was at that exact moment that I realized how my art was.

I stared at the photo-like drawing, although faded and sharp around the edges. The eyes of a goddess stared at me and I was so mystified that I could draw eyes like that.

As I walked out of the classroom I began to scan the other portraits. A variety of the pictures were of her face and shoulders, artists being other women probably too ashamed and against this type of art. A lot of the guys focused on her breasts and they snickered as they hobbled out of the room. There were a few decent portraits, many of them still with uncolored areas

Final grades would be posted tomorrow as far as I knew. This picture was practically what my future depended on. My life.

After seeing how well I did at this and then thinking of not passing this class would kill me inside. I’d probably begin to sketch the ways of death.

I walked out of the room and still I wondered. All through the rest of the evening, through my TV dinner and Mad TV, through the last chapters of a romance novel and into deep sleep I wondered if I had what it took to pass this class. After many debatable hours I finally concluded that I was good enough, but would others see it?

I waltzed into class that day with my shoulders bearing the weight of Atlas (who shrugged) and everybody was being lectured. I was late so I quietly took my seat.

When I looked at her I thought my eyes were kidding me but Miss Hashclipper was actually smiling. She was complimenting the very strange but lovely artwork we did and then she handed out our final grades.

I heard many a groan and many cheers. I was the last to be given the grade.

A: Marvelous perception. I hope you don’t mind but our muse went back to Sweden and asked for your artwork to hang in her house. I tried to reach you but the phone never seemed to be answered so I handed it over to her. You’d probably expect me to be mad at the fact that the greatest thing I ever drew was gone from reach now. But I wasn’t. Surprisingly, I was actually quite amazed, shocked and glad it was now in the care of one of my fans.

Best of all, I passed the class.

I was kind of of in a hurry to write this but here it is anyway. Enjoyed it or not?