Through the Snow

Hey there! Care for a review?

This is a cool poem. I think the biggest reason I like it is the subject you picked and the sentiment behind it. Firstly, you don't often see a love poem for someone other than a romantic interest. And secondly, I find that people tend to have unrealistically high standards for plow workers. Hearing people complain how this road and that road aren't plowed as timely as people would like, etc. But what people seldom realize is that a. there's often an incredibly large area that the snow falls, thus, it's hard to get to EVERYTHING the second it happens- I remember my coworker, who's husband was a snow plow driver, mentioning this to me.

And then, like in this poem, another thing that people don't realize is that these people have to leave their families on a moments notice, plow at any hour, and often even sleep away from their families, if they're working in a different town (correct me if I'm wrong). In any case, I was really glad to see a work on this!

One thing that I thought I might mention, was that you did pretty well with the rhyme scheme in this poem. But I kinda feel like it didn't do much for this poem. Maybe it's just me, but I find that rhyme-poems can really take the genuineness out of a poem. I think because often with rhyming, a poet may sacrifice what they really want to say, for a rhyme that sorta makes sense.

The other thing I thought could use some strengthening is the feeling in this poem. I felt like the story here was a really great foundation: a person's love for their father, and fearing seeing him drive off into the snowy night. But we don't really feel that fear. We don't really know what it's like. So how can you show us? Part of it can simply be using stronger images. The narrator is crying in this, but tears and all that are pretty usual ways of saying sadness. What are some other ways that you could convey the fear and anxiety that is being felt? Don't just tell us what's being felt- really try to paint the picture of it. Something that I think can sorta help get the idea for how to go about this, is trying to describe a colour- like red, without using the typical cliche words that are associated with red. Like anger and fire. Try to think outside of the norm for red. Try to capture the essence of the colour.

Anyway, I hope this was somewhat helpful! And I hope I see more from you in the future! C:

-Holysocks

Hi, Shikora here with a review.

Lets get to it.

Wow this is a really nice poem you have here. I really like the name you have chosen, when I saw it, I new I had to read this poem, and I'm glad I did, I really like it, and you chose a really good name to go with it to.
I also like the emotion you put into your poem, it helped me as the reader to know how your feeling.

I did see one small thing though.

that you'll be back tomorrow