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Re: The Thief That Stole Excalibur (Part 2)
This caught me off guard in the best possible way. So it seems Arthur is not as honorable as he usually is in these sorts of stories. I like it ...
Jan 25, 2019 -
Re: The Thief That Stole Excalibur (Part 1)
Bit of a disclaimer before I start, I don't know much about writing scripts (I usually stick to plain old prose), so if the suggestions I make don't apply to ...
Jan 23, 2019 -
Re: Snippet of a Scene
This does a really good job of creating mystery. I could see this as the opening scene for a novel depending on the overall story's flow. (I assume this is ...
Jan 21, 2019 -
Re: Marshy The Marshmallow
This makes me think of the countless marshmallows I've murdered throughout my life. I really liked how creative this is. It reminds me of the jokes my friends and I ...
Jan 19, 2019 -
Re: The REALITY of Middle School
Yea, this just reminds me how great it is to be past that stage in life. I remember feeling like this quite a lot, (Though I will admit that, looking ...
Oct 28, 2018 -
Re: The Funeral
Wow, I really like'd this! You did a great job at making me wonder why the protagonist was dead. And that ending was pretty clever, if a little morbid. (There's ...
Oct 27, 2018 -
Re: The Bard's Ballad Parts 2 and 3
Woah! That’s an interesting twist at the end there. I thought they were going to have to escape. Anyways, let’s get right into it. There were a few things that ...
Apr 20, 2018 -
Re: The Bard's Ballad Part 1
Hey. Welcome again to YWS. Let's get right into this review. I feel like you picked a really good time to start the story. It's always good to throw your ...
Apr 14, 2018 -
Re: The Infected Chapter 1 - Matt's Amazing Horselizards
Ok, this seems interesting. It needs a little work, but as with most writing, it could really shine after some revisions. I found this a bit confusing to read. You ...
Oct 12, 2017 -
Re: The Blank Page
This is a nice, brief, well written essay. It made me feel as if I am not alone. (I have many unfinished manuscripts. Trust me, I know how it feels). ...
Oct 10, 2017 -
Re: The world i live in-Ch. 1
Ok, I have swords, axes, scissors, and my bare hands. Which is your preferred tool for shredding things into really tiny pieces? Actually, This isn’t bad, especially for a draft. ...
Oct 10, 2017 -
Re: There Once Was a Dragon
Ok, that was a fun fantasy. I liked how it was from the dragons perspective. I don't remember ever having seen that before. I feel like this could be expanded ...
Oct 9, 2017 -
Re: Sing A New Song
Hi. This was a nice story, which once again reminded me of the power of God in peoples lives. I agree with MJTucker on most points, so I'm not going ...
Oct 9, 2017