This is a nice, brief, well written essay. It made me feel as if I am not alone. (I have many unfinished manuscripts. Trust me, I know how it feels).
Ok, I saw no problem's with the first paragraph, except the last sentence is a little clunky. The word "however," seems a little out of place, among other things.
The second paragraph was a little choppy. The third and fourth sentences especially. The beginning of the third is a little repetitive and unnecessary. You already mentioned that starting is overwhelming in the previous sentence The fourth sentence is a bit of a run on. You might try condensing it. I'd recommend not saying she's well known. Maybe just say she wrote Harry Potter?
Paragraph three is pretty much good.
Your final paragraph also needs a little work. (But what writing piece doesn't)? In the third sentence, you said that writing is put together "Word by word, and then sentence by sentence." My suggestion is to cut out the "And then." It doesn't need to be there and distracts from the meaning of the sentence. Towards the middle of the paragraph, you said that many people don't realize how hard it is to be a writer. The beginning of this sentence is redundant, because you used the word "people" twice. I also noticed your ending was a bit abrupt, at least to my ears. (This might just be me, but if others say the same, you should probably listen).
Another thing I noticed:
You started quite a few of your sentences with "and." This works sometimes, but not if overused. I'd suggest reading those sentences out loud to yourself. In fact, read the whole essay out loud. It will help you see what needs improvement.
It's a bit of a fixer upper, but it's good. Make sure to revise this essay, because with enough polish, it could really shine.
Thank's for taking the time to read this, I'm still a rookie at reviewing, so I'm sorry if I did anything wrong.
Points: 2965
Reviews: 44
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