inkwell

Welcome to YWS! First I will address the enjambment that is running amok in your poem. If you don't know, enjambment is when you continue your sentences without pause into ...

note: last thing to him, I'll move on to someone else. Dedicated to Allen Ginsberg Allen is a park Allen is a tree. His trunk carries memory, rings and rings ...

"A new thought process ‘click’. A new window appears Thought visualised" I love this line. This poem, however, suffers from a lack of punctuation. Corrections/suggestions in red. What’s N ext? ...

Santana, J ust L ike the F irst T ime I hate early mornings. I hate long days at uni. Ugh. What is uni? Are you expressing an inability to ...

Yep. Here it is. ___ The torrid , golden halo hangs high in the sky, A lazy horizon ripples like a Double Dutch skipping rope . Some cacti, dully green, ...

This poem is begging for some clarifying punctuation throughout. "For her, time is of the past, a dusty picture frame in which who she once was is frozen within." This ...

Let There Be Blight - Galerius (deleted, so no link, but in spoiler) Ethanol makes things quiet. That’s what the elderly whisper, even now, as they squat on putrid food, ...

Grass is prickling at my feet, my thoughts are restless in the heat. I want to be the rushing creek Punctuation at end of line needed, or make the following ...

OK, so the title is fantastic! At first I thought, "OK, the Nephies were giants resulting from angels and men in Genesis." The poem is obviously not about that, so ...

The title can go without the two periods. "as we, just you and I." What does this mean? Find yourselves as "we"? "Thunder and rain are across the coast." This ...

This is definitely a "lyric" poem, it is very rhythmic and it can kind of be sung. My one complaint is the redundant use of "long," otherwise the rest is ...

Nice poem! I like the repetition, it allows for the lines in the last stanza to be emphasized well. It has a strong ending which I always like and there ...

with your unshaven stubble dripping firmament Comma at the end of line? the long hairs tipped in gold. I would have kissed you if I could have kissed you and ...

Really? I think I was running on you last summer... Sorry, to the poem! :) First line is wonderful. Breathing IN with a sigh is so special and you worded ...

C'mon, really? I just wrote a whole damn poem about all this "untitled" nonsense. :p The first stanza needs punctuation at the end of the second line. Otherwise this was ...