flossybunny

Right, I've also read your previous chapter and enjoyed it but as pretty much everything I would have said had already been said, I chose to comment/review on this one! ...

I like that we finally have a 'bad guy' which links in and has succeeded in explaining how your other characters come together. I think this chapter has finally turned ...

I'm just going to dive straight in and comment as I'm reading through it! :P 1. 'We now know they were investigating something' The character probably already knew they were ...

Annoyed at myself for not reviewing this earlier as I had in actual fact read this one (and thought I'd reviewed it..) while I was on holiday. Anyway, most of ...

I'll break this in to two parts! Chapter 2: This really did make me laugh in a couple of places. Again, I love how realistic it is that they're getting ...

This is fantastic, it really is! I'd happily read more! The character's are completely realistic, they have well-detailed personalities and are relatable. I liked the twist at the end, I ...

I loved this, it's a really well-written piece. I like the 'four months' thing and how it recurred constantly throughout the story. I also liked that you made the character ...

And now I am eager for a fourth Chapter.... I love that it's coming together a bit more now which I was slight worried might not happen soon enough! I ...

I think this is definitely a story I can get into; I really enjoy the way you write. There's not much I think can be done to make this better ...

This was really well written in my opinion. You don't feel as though you should automatically be pitying the character, in fact, they are quite relatable. I found it easy ...

I think you used that song perfectly; it really enhanced the story. The way you developed the character was interesting, at times I almost felt sympathetic but I don't reckon ...

Wow, that's some really effective writing. You built up the suspense perfectly here; to begin with I didn't really know what to expect. I liked the fact it was relevant ...

I liked the distinct changes in characters here and I think using the time and location was a really effective way of splitting it up. Everything is well described here ...

I really enjoyed this piece of writing actually! I love how you've managed to completely immerse the reader in narrator's world from the very beginning. I thought it was also ...