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Re: HOPE
apparently, my pc did the mix up. and .I didn't preview it...i'm surprised myself cos this appeared a whole lot different from what I actually posted...I agree it will make ...
Jun 30, 2013 -
Re: .
hahaahaha.....this is a jumble of thoughts that is really funny! but there's no need to feel the way you do, i can assure you, there are a lot of people ...
Aug 21, 2012 -
Re: The woman
Thanks blue Africa. I'll take heed to your corrections.
Jan 31, 2012 -
Re: Write the Distance Away
Great Work. I have a problem with the structure and capitalization though. It's a nice tribute to those risking their lives for us.
Jan 31, 2012 -
Re: Empty Smiles
ok. This is a poem of five lines...a quintet...nicely done. It simple and very meaningful. A lot has been said in those five lines. It could be the signature statement ...
Jan 31, 2012 - Re: The woman Jan 31, 2012
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Re: Pieces
Thanks sarebear. Unfortunately, the character Isey Daughan does not have a boyfreind/crush/lover. She has no time to pursue all that. Her one and only love interest is Jesus; and yes, ...
Sep 4, 2011 -
Re: *Mute* Pending
OK. I can already form a melody to this lyric. It's very well written and I know it'll even sound better in a song. Kudos
Aug 29, 2011 -
Re: Insomnia
Nice structure and poem layout. Also the Imagery used there was expository and gave the reader insight as to what insomnia feels like. I really don't see much to criticize ...
Aug 28, 2011 -
Re: L.O.V.E= Fail!
Nice poem, just that I don't see the need for the pause effect in the last stanza. Good writing.
Aug 28, 2011 -
Re: All The Voices In My Head
The last thing you wrote about your muse...funny. I think the seventh line should be corrected thus; " Where Imagination hides away". That's all. Keep writing.
Aug 28, 2011 -
Re: The Beast
" My feet pounds the grass under my cleats"; since the first rhyme word is in the plural, cleat should come in plural form too. Good Writing, short but very ...
Aug 28, 2011 -
Re: Why I'm here: A Freak attempts to explain himself
First of all, Welcome to YWS Headfreakjay. What you wrote is extraordinary. I guess it's about various characters right?. The punctuation and grammar is right on point. Very creative.I'll like ...
Aug 20, 2011 -
Re: Forgotten Domain
Hi dear, I like this. I love the soft tone used and the fact that anyone can understand it. Good work. :)
Aug 18, 2011 -
Re: Four Untitled Poems...
I like! I found the first poem amusing. I really couldn't criticize anything. Thumbs up on this one.;)
Aug 18, 2011
