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Re: Mary Jane
I really liked this poem a lot but I am not completely sure what is going on. Maybe that is the point. My favorite lines are "To falling Beats of ...
Sep 20, 2009 -
Re: Love lost
Most poems usually have some type of scheme. This doesn't seem to have one, or I could not find it. Its really not a bad thing, I hardly ever have ...
Sep 20, 2009 -
Re: Street Lamp
I think this poem is great. A sentinel of sorts, head bowed to the darkness, that was my favorite line. I am a little confused what the sentinel is doing ...
Mar 16, 2009 -
Re: There's more to life than this
I enjoyed reading this. I like the message you are trying to send, or at least the message I interpreted from the poem. I think that it could flow better, ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: A nice winter swim
I think is poem is good but it could be SO Much better. I feel that I understand your poem but you could have used different, more descriptive words that ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: Getting it
I like what you are writing about. I enjoy thinking about things like too. But the flow of the poem is not to hot. Its really repetitive during some parts ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: Autumnal Night
I really enjoyed the poem. Your use of vocabulary is quite amazing. I agree with Anna. I did not think that the word Tarnish flowed well. When I was reading ...
Feb 17, 2009 -
Re: Gratitude..
It was a good poem! the only thing that bothered me was this line: "you never left when i am down" maybe you mean you never left when i was ...
Dec 6, 2008 -
Re: on love; you imparticular
I think its a very cute poem. I'm not entirely sure whats going on, maybe if it was longer you would be able to explain better. my favorite part was: ...
Nov 27, 2008 -
Re: Rumors
This is really good, I like it a lot. The rhymes don't sound forced, which is good. But I was wondering what happened to them? Why do they disappear in ...
Nov 27, 2008 -
Re: Reading Your Mind
I really liked this poem. I thought it was interesting and it soothed my mind in a way. Im not totally sure if I understand it, but i like it. ...
Nov 26, 2008 -
Re: Tears
This is a nice poem. Some rhymes felt effort less like the one in the 3rd stanza. But most of the other rhymes felt forced. I wasn't really sure what ...
Nov 26, 2008 -
Re: Thinking of you
I think it is a very cute poem! I totally get the story. And i know at the beginning you analogized about not having any imagery. I disagree with you ...
Nov 24, 2008 -
Re: Sleep
It was a good poem. But I didn't really connect with your character. And in the 10th like where it says "I see a something." Do you mean to have ...
Nov 23, 2008 -
Re: cal's sentient city contest
I thought it was good. Your great at descriptions which is great because if you cant describe something then you have nothing. But what kept bothering me was when i ...
Nov 23, 2008
