z

Young Writers Society



Getting it

by TrinLovesU


I don’t get it. :?:
We are sent to this earth for a reason right?
What is our purpose here?
I don’t understand. :?:
Why are we born in such a world filled with what it’s filled with?
Why is it filled with it?
I don’t get it. :?:
Who can answer my questions?
Why can you not answer my questions?
Why can I not answer my own questions?
I just don’t get it. :?:
Maybe that is our purpose in life:
To learn how to answer our own questions;
to answer others.
I still don’t really understand.
Maybe we are born in this world filled with what it’s filled with
because we need to learn how
solve our own our own problems, and others.
I might be starting to get it.
Maybe I can only find out my own answers to my own questions.
Maybe I have to find out for myself:
what life means to ME,
how I interpret it, for myself.
I think I get it.
Maybe im not right, maybe I am.
No one knows but the one, the all knowing,
The man upstairs, the man with all the answers;
GOD.
:idea: By golly I think I’ve got it! :idea:

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53 Reviews

Points: 1823
Reviews: 53

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Tue Apr 21, 2009 4:40 pm
break~my~heart wrote a review...



ello there! ash here :)

so, on to your review, I liked this idea behind the poem. It was refreshing and it actually made the reader think, unlike so many of the other poems on this site. so good job!

However, one nitpick I have is your use of question marks. you know, these ==> :?:
Please, please don't use these in your writing! It makes your work look rather immaturish (new adj!hehe) and they distract from you words, which is never a good thing. If you want people to take your writing seriously, you must present it well enough. Bright yellow question marks and lightbulbs are not a good way to do that ;)

Who can answer my questions?


Above, I have quoted something that rather bothered me. In this line, you are lacking detail, What are you questions about?

Maybe we are born in this world filled with what it’s filled with


Again, you are lacking detail and description. What is the world filled with? likewise, what are we filled with when we are born?

Maybe I have to find out for myself:

what life means to ME,

how I interpret it, for myself


I love this! it's the perfect closing! nice work!


So all in all, you have wonderful talent! keep writing

-ash




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42 Reviews

Points: 1179
Reviews: 42

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Sun Mar 15, 2009 2:27 pm
carolinewashere wrote a review...



I like what you are writing about. I enjoy thinking about things like too. But the flow of the poem is not to hot. Its really repetitive during some parts and i do not really like this part:

Why are we born in such a world filled with what it’s filled with?
Why is it filled with it?

How about explaining what it is filled with?? Is it filled with hate? Loss of innocence? etc.

If you made this poem stronger and flow better I think it would be really great. This is a topic i enjoy contemplating and I am glad someone wrote a poem about it.

keep it up!





I don't do time.
— Liberty