Sureal

Hey Fellow. =) I seem to remember you saying that English isn’t your first language or something? Anyway, you have some awkwardly phrased sentences and switch tenses a few times ...

Hey there Aseka. =) Before I begin, I just have to point out that YWS has a ‘2 to 1’ policy. That is, you’re meant to give two reviews to ...

Hey there i think i can, my name is Sureal, and I’ll be your reviewer for today. =D My way of reviewing tends to be to quote sections of your ...

Her tears fell, causing a ripple effect which went on for a moment only to fade away as had her cries for help in the night, and because of that ...

Hey there linkasy. My name is Sureal, and I’ll be your reviewer for today. ;) I’m gonna go through, quote sections, and give suggestions on how to improve said section, ...

I like it. Very surreal. :) ignoring the light tells them to/STOP. The syntax here threw me off. Do you mean ‘light telling them’, or ‘light that tells them’, perhaps? ...

Hey Kitty. ^_^ “Gas masks on, this way boys!” With that, the remaining soldiers covered their faces and dropped to the scarlet field, gulping deep breaths of air as they ...

Hey there Soul of the Phantom. ^_^ nothing more then a drop of water in this ocean. The metaphor of a drop of water in an ocean is rather cliched ...

Prologue You open with a relatively lengthy paragraph describing the weather. This isn’t really what you want. Not only is opening with description usually rather dull, but opening with a ...

Literature at its finest. You're really pushing the boundaries of the art form. Your experimentation and use of new, radical techniques is truly inspiring. The inclusion of 'OMG' and '#' ...

Haven't read any of them. I've heard that they're well written, but feature dull, flat and unlikable characters (the main character in particular). Also, all the people raving about them ...

I didn't know what it meant, but then wikipedia told me: Keening is a form of vocal lament associated with mourning that is traditional in Scotland and Ireland. What an ...

Hey. ^_^ Your rendition of an annoying voice in Danielle is very well done. It almost gave me a headache too (in a good way, of course). Going back to ...

Hey. ^_^ To be frank, I don't think this is as strong an opening scene as your origional. Opening with a sex scene grabs the attention in a way that ...

You're 17 and you don't understand the concept of a figure of speech (metaphors, personification, simileis, etc)? How did you pass your English tests? :shock: