Salliewalker

I like this. Short, concise, nostalgic imagery. The only thing I have to say is, you should change "bye" (in both title and poem) to "goodbye". Bye makes the end ...

I feel an important thing you're not quite following is the rhythm that Tolkien uses in his poetry. When something doesn't flow right, then that's the first thing you notice. ...

I'm gonna say good things about this, and then some other stuff. I like the beginning of the poem very much. It's very sturdy, rhythmic, gives us a sense of ...

I feel this is a bit abrupt. My favorite lines would be "the ferryman arrives, I have no fare"... but right after that, you seem to go directly to the ...

The rhythm is good, except in various spots in the first few stanzas. I feel this poem is a little typical, especially in the last lines. If you gave one ...

I like this a lot. I felt this was a little bit short, so if you had more colors added to this (red, blue, etc. Using primary colors would give ...

I like this. It's interesting, out of the box, definitely something people won't think of to write for a poem. A suggestion for future ideas--perhaps using abbreviations as a poem? ...

I wanna say I like this poem, but I have a few problems with it. I do like that this poem has great potential, how it kind of begins with ...

The form you've written this with is really, really good. The rhythm as well. I also like how you started out the poem, "Your hand perched on my hip so ...

I feel the loneliness in this poem. I've written my fair share of depressed poems in my time--it's been at least a year or two since my last one. I ...

I agree with Kyllorac about the rhythm--either you could work a little more on changing up the words until you get the rhythm back, or you could more easily reestablish ...

This makes me curious to what kind of topic you're writing about. It definitely sounds like a tragedy. But what does "Lite the torches" connote in meaning to you ? ...

Wonderful to hear that you've found faith in Him :). I'd have to disagree with some of the people above. This poem is based firmly on faith--those who have not ...

Very different and unique. Gives you a kind of different look on the 'chic' trend of nightclubbing. I like some of the phrases, like 'the evening’s vain festivities now done', ...

I like how you put 'reach the city in the sky, welcome to your new home'. What I don't like is the general execution of the big picture. I mean, ...