Milanimo

Hi! I liked this poem. It was very descriptive and the imagery was subtle but well-thought out. I liked how you incorporated both the hunger and feel of the noodles ...

I enjoy the italics! It's a bit like a song where the beginning, middle, and end, are emphasized. The imagery is lovely. I can definitely tell that you put thought ...

This is really good! The imagery is clear and vivid, and the suspense about the character was handled well! Also the fight definitely held good fast-paced action. It was quick ...

Hi! I agree with Elinor Brynn that it's missing something. The verb tenses you use seem to contradict each other. I can't tell what's in the present and the past. ...

Very nice! The plot was easy to follow and the repitition was good as well. I was a bit off put by the constant phrase "the monsters" but it adds ...

Hello! I think this poem is good in the format it is, no rhyming needed. The rhyming would be too complicated and would ruin the integrity of the poem, if ...

Hi! I also cannot find anything wrong. Sorry I'm not much help. What pulled me to your poem though, was the immediate connection to Slaughterhouse-five. Although a book of almost ...

Hi! Here to get you out of the green room! I'm going to focus more on certain parts of the work than the overall piece. I've learned that starting with ...

Here to get you out of the green room. I agree that punctuation is need here, as it can show the transition between thoughts and it just seems to fit ...

The poem does seem incomplete. It focuses on the description(which is beautiful) and not the context. There is not enough mentioning of the past in the poem. The first and ...

This is a very nice poem! I enjoy how you incorporated different forms of art and started broad and slowly specified. It's nice to start big and end small and ...

Hello! Your first paragraph is what I call a data dump. It's when you insert a bunch of information all at once. This overwhelms the reader and also sounds very ...

Hi! "seeing that he had a two, four, seven, and a baron." It might sound smoother if you add an "a" before each number. "One it came to the man ...

Hi! Here the work out the green room! "Her plan was simple, but a good way to get back at Kalan." You might want to add in "it was" before ...

Hi! "The man sighs again because he knew exactly how Wyatt feels" Change "knew" to "knows". "Knew" is past tense. "feels, losing something so important is like tearing a piece ...