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Re: The War of Innocence
I'm not going to comment on the topic you've chosen, since it's very political, so we'll just focus on the poem itself, yeah? :) An innocence awaits, Innocent, dear. That ...
Feb 1, 2016 -
Re: white gold // a purity previously unknown
Hey darlin!
Jan 17, 2016 -
Re: Sherbet Lemons: Chapter 1
Hi darling So I get what you're doing here, making it all disjointed and jumpy because everyone's all stressed out and stuff-- but I'm not quite sure it's effective. It ...
Jan 2, 2016 -
Re: Deleted 61
second promised review, love! "watch the grass es " I'd make it just grass. "playing with a fire truck long abandoned" IDK WHY but for some reason I really really ...
Nov 9, 2015 -
Re: Deleted 62
Hello darling. Here to as promised
Nov 9, 2015 -
Re: Deleted 60
hi darling so like i told you last night this might be my favorite lumi poem. And it's not because it's perfect and there are no mistakes but because of ...
Oct 15, 2015 -
Re: Deleted 59
Hi darling I noticed you're still in the green room like I am so I thought I'd pop by and give my thoughts. I love this. My favorite part is ...
Oct 10, 2015 -
Re: I did it for you
Let's dance, sugar
Sep 19, 2015 -
Re: Amphitheater.
So I've always loved the idea of writing about amphitheaters and gladiators in my poetry. I've even tried it several times and it's never really worked for me-- so I ...
Sep 3, 2015 -
Re: Spelling
Hello! This is cute! So I'm obviously not going to correct the spelling mistakes because I assume they were completely intentional. Which I totally respect. This poem is cute and ...
Sep 3, 2015 -
Re: cracked skin
hey babe! I liked this. Until like stanza three, where it become a little overwrought and too much for my taste. So my review is mostly going to be able ...
Aug 25, 2015 -
Re: this is how you're beautiful, dearest delia
Hello! My name is Spark :) Wow, this is a long poem. I love it, and I love the premise behind it, but it's so incredibly long winded, that I ...
Jun 13, 2015 -
Re: Are we out of the woods yet?
Okay so I really want to like this. I like the topic, but it's completely riddled with simple errors. Which is actually really surprising considering I've been reading your work ...
Jun 13, 2015 -
Re: Ignorance is bliss
Hi darling. Let's jam. a representation of my heart, little did it know. The italics are out of place. You don't have them anywhere else in the poem, and they ...
Apr 17, 2015 -
Re: My Existence!
Hello darling. let's dance. I can't say I enjoyed this. It felt like you were trying to write a very pretentious, uppty poem, but what actually happened was it made ...
Apr 1, 2015