Jiggity

Very disturbing. Insanely so. Why had chosen to stay home this weekend instead of going with his family. Why had he... Random madness. I hate that personally, I prefer usually ...

Ah, I've read and commented on this before and I may be mistaken, but I think the title has changed. The only difference, and again I could be wrong as ...

ideal place to act out the dramas of their minds This is an awkward sentence that doesn't wuite make sense. I think something like, 'ideal place to act out imagined ...

The human had eyes as blue and the ocean. I think perhaps you missed, 'deep as' after 'and'. Otherwise 'and' needs to be changed to 'as'. He had pale like ...

I had difficulty understanding this. Especially just who exactly it was whose POV we were sharing. Thats the clicnher there, cos I thought I knew but apparently I was wrong. ...

I was under the impression that the term is actually spelt, 'Sidhe'. I wasnt 100% certain of that so I looked it up and found I was right whereas 'Sidh' ...

where the back of my color chaffed collar. He perfectly at home in the dark, traipsing across He was He spoke but his words were so soft that I had ...

Wow. Go Impy! This was fantastic, truly, just great with a lovely rhythm. Although you'll forgive me for being slow and not really understanding what the hell was happening due ...

Icky. I didnt enjoy this, at all. Too much telling. I did this, then I did that, then this happened so I went and did something else. Boring! What are ...

Hola 'dettie! Cut the first line. I am a darkened figure upon the so pure white, and never to be shadowed, world I think this would work better with an ...

Very interesting; I agree with much of what Snoinkles said, although the sunset stuff isnt really necessary. But yes, kudos on the good story...I do hope you explain how a ...

Well, I take it this is an attempt by you to familiarise yourself with first person writing? If so, I sympathise. I hate first person story writing, I suck at ...

Awesome books, hilarious, witty and intelligent with a new take on old fantasy staple (fairies) and a melding of magic and modern technology the like of which hasnt been seen ...

One says, glancing out my eyes and then moving father back into my head further/farther I think I may be alone in this, but the beginning with One is a ...

Ahem, well. This had a Matrix-style feel to it; in terms of the real world versu the Matrix, the illusion. Apart from that, I think whoever judges/reads this will be ...