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Re: IRONCLAW Chapter 3.1: Hound
Hey, Fade here for a review~ WOW. You are an AMAZING writer! I honestly could find almost nothing to critique! That takes talent, trust me. So, as I said before, ...
Nov 28, 2014 -
Re: A Light in the Darkness
Hi there! Review Mode:ON Okay, so this was really sad yet enjoyable. A few things I must criticize: First, you've spaced things out wrong. Instead of each line being separate, ...
Jul 12, 2014 -
Re: You Have Storm Clouds in You
Hey there! Review Mode: On Wow. This was AMAZING. It was very well written and had a lot of feeling to it. I really can't criticize anything except maybe this ...
Jul 12, 2014 -
Re: Corps of Recovery: Part 8
HAPPY REVIEW DAY Hi there! Fade here to review
May 25, 2014 -
Re: The cold within: Chapter 1.
HAPPY REVIEW DAY Hi! Fade here to review
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Castor's Tale Chapter 3 Part 1 - A Stirred Pot
Hi! So i'm going to jump right in: "Miles approached Jeric who was tossing leftovers out to the hogs out behind the Inn." There needs to be a comma after ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: tick tick tick
Hello! So, I noticed that you have 0 capitalized letters. While I see how this could be for better flow, it sends the message that you are an amateur poet, ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Pokemon Ultimate Evolution Season 2: Episode 12, Out of touch
Hiya! First off, I gotta do some nitpicking! In "and I left explore Fearahu", you need to add "to" in between left and explore. Also, I think you should make ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Koala's Climb
First, you have made the mistake that so many writers and poets make! ease up on the use of periods! It interrupts the flow of the poem! Also, the k ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Wordsmithing: A Response to Grammar
Hi, Fade here to review! So, funnily enough, you have a grammar mistake in the first paragraph. "Its" should have an apostrophe, dear! You made the same mistake in the ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Goodbye...
Not a lot to criticize. I will say that the spaces before the question marks aren't necessary. Also, you missed some important punctuation such as the apostrophe before "till" in ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: There Is But One
Jumping right in: Ease up on the amount of periods you are using. It breaks the flow of the song. I don't think that the stars (*) are necessary. The ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Nausea fig. 2
I'm going to start immediately. First off, in the first stanza I think the repetition of "could only watch" is used WAY too much. Also, try to use different words ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Today's not Yesterday
Hi! Great lyrics! First off, i'd suggest easing up a little on the use of periods. It interrupts the flow of the song. Also, in the first stanza you rhymed ...
May 25, 2014 -
Re: Dancing on the Edge
Hi! Great lyrics! First off, I think you should separate these parts into their own lines: "They wanna run a marathon" and "They come at me through the scream" Just ...
May 25, 2014